If I could turn back time, I would.

Just words

If I could turn back time, I would.....

I called beautiful Brigitte at 3 am and I awoke her up in Böblingen in the early Fall of 1981, Germany. She answered with a gentle and sweet voice. Hello dearest Johnnie. Are you remembering me tonight? I told her. I was reading your letters tonight and I need you near. Do you miss me, like I miss you?

Brigitte held silence for a minute and she whispered. Come back to me in Germany. I have a apartment near the lake in Böblingen. I have a large bathtub and I need you to wash my hair and read poetry to me. The tub is large and you can join me now. The great ocean isn't what is separating us. You must be brave, cross the sea and I would keep you warm and safe.

I told her. You saved me so often and I owe you a lifetime of kisses, a lifetime of laughter. I haven't seen you in one year. I found good work and some wild friends. Could you come to me? We can do our midnight dances and I would hold you gently thru the night.

Brigitte begin to cry and she whispered. I am a German girl and I don't need or want the confusion of the United states. Remember the May Festivals, we drank the cognac and we danced by the lake. No-one had loved me liked you loved me. I look at the photos of Tübingen, where you and I listen to Joan Baez. I remembered we slept in a sleeping bag near the river. Was a unforgettable night. My father had work for you and we could make the apartment perfect. I have a old record player and the records, you left with me. I play the Leonard Cohen songs at midnight and I remember us. How you would dried me off softly with the cotton towel and we would dance and kiss till we could not. I still have the small bed. Just a reminder of us. We didn't need distance. We needed to feel our skin again skin. Please Johnnie. Almost October and we could go the Stuttgart October festival. Drink, sing and dance again.

I listened and I knew. Beautiful Brigitte, her last words. Kind, sweet and wonderful. Was still a goodbye. I told her. My love, my darling. I am needed here and I miss you so. Please don't forget me and I love you so. She told me. I am easy to find. I am working as a nurse and I go to the lake daily. I drink my coffee and I go to our favorite bakery. I buy some sweets and I wish you were with me drinking coffee and talking. I love you Johnnie. Please don't forget me. Goodbye my love..

I hung the phone-up and I drank the Johnnie Walker whiskey. I told the empty rooms, the crushing walls. Goodbye my sweetest days, my sweetest dreams.

I re-read Brigitte old letters five years later and I wrote to journal.

"If I could turn back time, I would...

Dearest Brigitte,

the kindest and sweetest woman I ever known.

I remember you and

If I could turn back time, I would.

I should of ran to you, swam to you,

took the first plane to Boblingen and waited for you by the small lake.

You were my ambrosia, the kindest touch I ever known.

Now I know.

Someone lucky had your precious love and

I have learn.

You were a blessing and a miracle.

If I could turn back time.

I would of held and loved you,

forever and a day. Never releasing you.

Wise men learn too late,

time cannot be changed,

love sweet is rare and when love is near.

Don't allow her to leave your life."

You can't return to a perfect place,

time wait for no-one.

Coyote

Author's Note

Some words.

Reviews

[Vertigo Cat1111]

Absolutely beautiful words. They paint such a beautiful picture and tells such a nostalgic story. It feels like such wisdom went into this and so much love too. I really enjoyed how palpable and deep this makes you feel. Thank you so much for sharing.

[Coyote Poetry]

Thank you my kind friend for reading and the comment. I do appreciate. The past. Maybe the writers wealth to create?

[.]

I don't know if I am eligible to leave my thought here, but in general I like your saying... Time stops for none and more so if those are the precious one which we cherished once. But we seem to take time as it is and value less when it is on our hand, thus regretting later on. Only if we could understand in right time that it is "" That time"....

[Coyote Poetry]

I love to read your words dear friend always. I agree with you. "That time". Now, use and make last forever. Thank you for reading and the comment.

[.]

You are welcome

[John the Baptist]

Some philosophies state that time does not exist, that in our higher minds, the time is always now. I can buy that, but in the physical world, things change, including people. Looking back in regret is futile; some things have to be chalked up to experience and released, though that process can be painful.

[Coyote Poetry]

I agree my friend. But time used is time gone. You can't get the time back. Thank you my friend for reading and the comment my friend.

[Pryde Foltz]

This write really touched me, Coyote,

A wise man know love is all there is but a brave man lives it:)

[Coyote Poetry]

I agree dear Pryde. We must go forward and be brave.

[Lydia Shutter]

It's a great song and one that I think a lot of us identify with. As we get older, we realize how wonderful certain people were in our lives....how we wish we could be with them again. Lots of romance, longing, and regret in this one, John. Always beautifully written. Lydi**

[Coyote Poetry]

Thank you dear Lydia. I agree. All of us learn regret. Make us wiser.

[Audrey M.]

Coyote, you pull at the heartstrings with this one. Such a lovely but sad story. At least you got to speak with her and hear her voice. While the time spent together were few, those are still moments that exist and oooohh what sweet memories they conjure : )

[Coyote Poetry]

Thank you dear Audrey. You are right. We did say goodbye to each other.

[The Rock And Roll Cowbo..]

oh how many times i wish i could turn back time.

Your deeply heartfelt words tug at my heartstrings.

[Coyote Poetry]

Me too my friend. Time isn't our friend sometime. We learn to late. We held a diamond and we allowed her to leave our life.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

Yes, there are a couple women, especially one, I sometime regret...I was too young, too inexperienced, too restless to stay...
she is on my mind often and I do write about her...
There are days, there are days...thoughts...poems.
j.

[Coyote Poetry]

Those were the days my friend, I do agree and thank you Jacob for reading and the comment.

[Annette Pisano-Higley]

"Wise men learn too late,
time cannot be changed,
love sweet is rare and when love is near.
Don't allow her to leave your life."
...and you are a truly wise man dear Coyote. This is a beautiful homage to lost love and eternal regrets. Only you can write in this way that sheds sad tears of the heart. So well-penned, with beautiful imagery and dialogue...filled with exquisite emotion and heartache. As always, thank you for sharing your life and your writing with us my dear friend.

[Coyote Poetry]

Thank you dear Annette. I wish I knew how to track people in Germany. Dear Brigitte got marry and I would love to know how she did.

[Chris Shaw]

If I could turn back time. I have always loved that song so much. Until today I have only heard Cher singing it.

With age comes wisdom. With age you realise that love is all important. Without it we can't be truly happy.

I would imagine it takes much thought to up and leave your own country. I am not sure I could do it, but then again I have never fallen head over heels for someone who lives overseas.

We all have regrets, your lines touch on the emotions and pull at the heart strings. Tender feeling expressed beautifully. Wonderful writing Coyote.

Chris

[Coyote Poetry]

Hard to leave a place you love. Germany was wonderful and I understood her dear Chris. Thank you for reading and the comment. I do appreciate.