the arrogant mage

the arrogant mage

A Chapter by joshua deathdealer
"

11/2011 (Fantasy Installment Two)

"
The shadowy clouds that gathered above
matched the heart of the young man
that rode a hellish steed, expeditiously 
towards the impending and soaring citadel

He had studied long and laboriously in
consideration of this glorious day, he 
had ruthlessly murdered countless clergy  
in order to absorb enough spiritual essence 

To ascend to the level of the most high
gods, to return and reign over this lowly
world with superiority and fear, laughter bursts
out as he makes his way to the massive entrance

This was his destiny, pushing open the door
he walks in whistling a favorite tune, in the
center of the room was a perfectly square
mirror, no reflection just murky silvery swirls

His black mantle flutters as he rushes to the
ethereal gateway, a monk stands up from
the tables that surrounds the speculum in an
effort to stop the dark wizard's advancement 

Lightning stabs through the walls and strikes
the ill fated servant, thunder follows as he 
falls to the floor and the arrogant mage steps
over the smoking body to stands before the portal

Lifting his arms upward, he commands that
the gods receive him into their divine dimension
and grant him the powers that he so rightfully deserves,
a huge hand reaches out and squashes him like a bug


© 2012 joshua deathdealer


Author's Note

joshua deathdealer
"Pride goeth before destruction, and an haughty spirit before a fall."

My Review

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Featured Review

Really enjoyed. I'm a sucker for a horse and sword story of any kind, especially when there's magic afoot. Really nice imagery, and foreshadowing. The only constructive crit I can offer is that in the last line of stanza five....there should be an apostraphe on "dark wizard's advancement." just a typo. Kickass poem dude.
Cheers!

Posted 12 Years Ago


2 of 2 people found this review constructive.




Reviews

love the ending

Posted 12 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

The ending made the story complete. When we think we are God's. We will fall down very quickly and painful like in the poem. I like how you create a man with great goals and arrogant dreams. A perfect ending to a outstanding poem.
Coyote

Posted 12 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

cool write with great images, the story is awesome, and what an ending, bravo Josh

Posted 12 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Epic

Posted 12 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Wow, you are really good at this type of writing! Such imagination, but it's different. Keep 'em coming!!

Posted 12 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Unexpected ending! This reads so much like a story to me---Now i need to go back and see if I can find the first installment

Posted 12 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

This reminds me of Highlander so much. The battle scenes between Ramirez and the Kurgen and that final showdown between McLeod and the Kurgen. Excellent piece, brother.

Posted 12 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Always an enjoyable read.. and such a wonderful imagination!!

Posted 12 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Wow its like a story in a poet way with so many interesting descriptions creating so many images that lead to action and mystery like a scifi. Anyways well done with this poem and nice saying as pride falls descruction dose come as your spirit the same.

Posted 12 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

wow!
you've got quite an imagination!

Posted 12 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.


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Stats

1406 Views
37 Reviews
Rating
Shelved in 2 Libraries
Added on November 10, 2011
Last Updated on July 1, 2012
Tags: fantasy, magic, pride, metaphoric, arrogance


Author

joshua deathdealer
joshua deathdealer

Casket City, FL



About
"My trepidation of things past is not a song with a beginning, middle and end. But an endless symphony playing infinite variations on the same theme. One day of sadness fades into another and the .. more..

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