Second Chances

Chapter 4

As I remain in the house swept away by the thought of Derek and if maybe I crushed him, or maybe it was a joke, perhaps it was no big deal and I am making it into a big deal, not as if he is emailed me back and I do not think it would be necessary to bombard him with such things. Suddenly a startling ring comes from the phone I hesitate only a moment and answer.

“Hey. It is John, please don’t hang up Val.,” he says in a calm but still cautious voice.

I decide not to hang up and respond in a snarky annoyed tone “WHAT, What do you want now John?”, and I can tell I was much more harsh than I needed to be, but I was not fixing to apologies for that.

“I was wondering if you… you were available to go out this evening, say about six.” I sigh and with a soft voice say sure. I know what he is trying to do and perhaps he needs a second chance.

“GREAT”, he says! I cannot wait to see you!

The phone hangs up and I am left to think what I have done! I know how this will end, I know I am not into being with John we broke up for a reason, and we have changed so much in the last few months apart. I know I cannot expect us to be any more than… well ex-lovers if that is what you want to bother to call it. I know I should probably tell Emily, but she is been so busy lately and I really do not wish to bother her with this one night.

Before long its five thirty and I am dressing for this so called date. I grab my pair of boots, a pair of old jeans that are appropriate, my black tank to go under my black sweater, and throw my hair into a pony tail, and I am ready to go. There is a knock at the door and I know exactly who it is. Punctual as always there is John holding a single white rose, which are my favorite and dressed it a nice pair of jeans, with his dark blue long sleeve with a carhartt jacket he is has since forever, and I can smell is cologne it is an amazing scent. He grins and I shyly smile back.

Hey, he says in a raw but happy voice. I am not exactly quick to respond.

 “Hello”, I respond and he grabs my hand and walks me down the drive way. We get to his black pick up that held so many memories of our past and he opens my door, I crawl in and buckle my belt. He climbs in on his side and roars the truck to life. The cab of the truck is warm, and it feels so good.

He speaks again, “Valery, it has been so long since we have talked and I have to tell you I am glad you agreed to come out with me, I have missed you and I can’t explain how stupid I was to break it off with you!”

I hesitate and ask, “Then what made you think it was going to be better now, now that we have seen life apart what makes you think this is not just me trying to be polite?”

I see the pain on his face and then he speaks,

“I know… I know what I did hurt you. I thought things would only get easier being apart. I did not realize how much I needed you. I love you Val! I have always loved you. I dated those girls to try and get over you and I never once did. How can that not be proof enough that I am supposed to be with you?”

I am a bit in shock when he finishes his love professing speech, and I sit for a moment thinking and then ask,

“Why is it me? What about if I have eyes for another and I feel nothing the same for you? You act as though I sat around just waiting, waiting on you! I have had other offers, and for once I think you are wrong we are not supposed to be together. If it were so months ago you would have made this move.”

He looks at me and I notice we have stopped we are at the park where he first asked me out and we both climb out of the truck. I know then what he is planning to do. He then goes to speak,

“Is there someone else?”

I think to myself Derek, but I can’t say that I just turned him down. I find myself backed into a corner, and I just want to go home but I say to him,

“Possibly, nothing conclusive yet, and before you bother to ask you do not know him.”

I know he can be nosy and before giving him any room to pry I walk to the bleachers by the basketball court and sit down. Soon he is next to me, and holding my hand. He sighs and says,

“I cannot make you feel the same way but I want to do something, just to see if it is true, and if not we can forget today ever happen.”

Before I can stop him he is clutching my face in his hands and he softly kisses my frozen lips and his are warm, before I know what I am doing I pull away! I yell at him,

“What are you doing? This is not happening right now take me home!”

Stunned and a bit angry I walk to the truck! How dare he assume it is just okay to kiss me! Was he like raised in a barn or someplace where kissing when he feels like it is okay! I hop back in the truck and he gets in next to me. He goes to speak and then stops, and good thing to because I do not think I could listen to another word from him.

Soon we arrive back at my drive way, and I slide out! Slamming the door behind me he rolls the window down and says,

“I sure hope he is good for you Valery! I wish you the best!”

Just like that he is gone, he stops I see his taillights and then he is gone. I stand at the steps leading into the house and I am stunned, what did I just decide. What did I just do? I walk into the house strip off my jacket and boots and walk to my room. I sit at my computer and I have an email.

 

To Valery Gail

From Derek Phelps

Subject I understand.

                I do understand your reservations and I am aware things are moving very fast. I would never expect you to give up anything for me. All I can ask is that you give me a chance I leave in two weeks’ time and I would love to spend that time with you. Only if you are comfortable. Sorry took a while to respond work is been busy!

Sincerely,

Derek Phelps

PVT D Phelps

United States Army

 

His words are almost to welcome and I cannot think of anything better than a second chance so I write him back.

 

To Derek Phelps

From Valery Gail

Subject Chance

                I am glad to have gotten an email from you. I almost thought you did not wish to speak to me. I will give you what you request a chance. You can try and pull your flattery on me in the next two weeks and I will then give you a fair answer.

 

Sincerely,

Valery Gail

 

I hit send and turn the computer off. I have had enough crazy for one night and I just want to go to bed. I get into my favorite pajamas and create a messy bun and tie it to the top of my head. Lying in bed that night I smile because I believe I am finally doing the right thing, even though I had to endure a night and unwanted kiss by John. How am I going to keep that thought away? I then drift into a peaceful and sound sleep.