Bounderby Syndrome

Oliver Twist scored his

place in our hearts as

the orphan who earned,

through hardship,

the life and love he deserved,

leaving no pity to bleed

for those who achieve

through effort

because deep down we believe

that if you’ve got it,

you ripped off somebody

and if you haven’t

then it should be

handed over on a shiny plate.

 

Working class heroes have been

a constant collective favourite,

but now that's taken to the extreme

so that the rich make rips

in designer jeans

and talk cockney like

all the presenters on TV; twist

their indulgent mothers into

witches cackling outside cages;

expensive schools morph,

become overcrowded zoos

until their lives are like

defaced textbook pages:

scrawled myths blacking out truth

solidifying into history over the ages,

occupying us more than real information.

 

Pasts mentally splintered into versions.

 

You see people at parties blushing,

embarrassed for not having been abused,

which must mean their childhood was cushioned;

the problem is, each time everyone assumes

this, there’ll be someone easily influenced,

confused as they exit crowded rooms –

maybe a kid whose innocence

was violated prematurely (or overdue

if you’re of this mind that reality

is dark…coloured like a bruise;

experience fisted into infancy).

So fear that their secret might erupt

will be coupled with new belief

that people might misconceive an overflowing cup

from any determination to succeed

 

and that is why so many kids

are blatantly fucked up.

 

Author's Note

This is the old lay-out because I haven't got the right disk at work with me.
Does the message get across? What else do you think about it? Thanks.

Reviews

[Bubo]

handed over on shiny plate. (handed on a .....)
the problem is, each time everyone assumes
this, (think u could drop this)

Started light hearted and sank into a pretty deep piece...........
well for me anyway.........and what a wallop of a punch line at the end
I think there is so much here in your words..........social misfits some are
and some do cover up a painful past masking it with success...........
I thought the flow was great, except the 2 bits I picked out, but I can
be the worlds worst reviewer!

You see people at parties blushing,
embarrassed for not having been abused,
which must mean childhood was cushioned;
the problem is, each time everyone assumes

I loved this........we humans are complex subjects, thank
god i don't attend many parties!

so that the rich make rips
in designer jeans
and talk cockney like
all the presenters on TV; twist
their indulgent mothers into
witches cackling outside cages;

The imagary in this was fab, made me laugh!How true!
Really enjoyable piece!

[Gandré]

I have read this with interest. It is the society what is f-u-c-k-e-d up. It is a tragedy. Even the parents of those children need a therapy and not their kids only, children develop mental state concepts uniformly with parents and rapidly in the preschool period when general reasoning powers are limited but when their parents aren't able to provide them with a secure frame and loving sustainable environment and satisfy their primary needs, how can the society get strong adults, this is a perfect poem opening eyes - and minds, hopefully also those will read who can make a change, and this is everywhere so, in our western world. great writing.

[Emily B]

Very smart. So very true. No other has that certain knack you have.

[kimo]

oooh
this is very
very good.

[MKD]

You remind me of one of my former teachers; honest in his own opinion, and so convincing of it he could make you believe anything. I can't even remember what I was thinking before I read this, which in my book, makes it a great piece of work. Thank you for the reminder of something great.

[Melanie Jane Boicourt S..]

Very interesting piece. There is so much revealed in this.
I like this line.
"until their lives are like
defaced textbook pages:
scrawled myths blacking out truth
solidifying into history over the ages,
occupying us more than real information"

What is the truth anymore? It is funny how we have technology that can give us real time info, and yet there will be something important happen in the world and it will be concealed from us for weeks, months, or even years.
Thank you for sharing. This does not seem like your typical writing. I like it though. The last stanza kindof ran together for me because of puctuation but you do not need to fix it on my behalf.
Love All, Mejasha

[R. MonaLeza]

I wanted to hurry over and read this, but I plan to come back and peruse it closer. So much is said in so many ways and I really want to mull it over some since I'm at work right now. I'll be back!

[Angelheaded Hipster]

To be honest with you....I envy those with normal childhoods...with parents who loved them, and supported their children's endeavors.
I like the flow of this, and I can't help but think there's an angry current on the bottom of this...Hmmm. This one will stick for awhile, me thinks.

[TL Boehm]

wow. This is a powerful write and sadly true. I was an abused kid - but you know - so were most of my friends so I never realized I wasn't normal until I got out in the world and learned that the things my parents did - should never be done to a child. But I also realized - they didn't know any better - they treated me as they had been treated. So when I had kids of my own....I CHOSE not to abuse. I am more than the sum of my DNA...and so are they. Eventually - one must look at oneself and take responsibility for ones own life. My older boy is 'normal' and I consider that a gift. So does he. The younger has some personality issues - but we are working on them...and I hope that he grows up to be "normal" as well. I digress, my apologies. I concur with this write - this is a SMART poem...

[Rain]

God, what a great write. White suburban kids in $50000 Suv's singing about the mean streets of Cabrini Green. This piece is an important commentary, it's not just writing. Life teaches us all the "same" lessons, only in different class rooms. I hope I'm not misreading your intent. But, unless you've been in rehab..or can't be called a victim, or won't be called a victim, you haven't lived the "real" life. If I'm reading this wrong, at least you know my sentiments. Gone is being nice. Having class and self dignity are flaws.
I'd better stop, lest I be wrong. :) I took it, the way I felt it, and I loved it. Rain

[Gary H]

Felt this was a very absorbing read. Many kids today think they are fucked up. I wonder, as you touched on, how many could survive a life in Oliver Twists time? Maybe today there are just too many reasons for bad behaviour and justification for it? But I'm being unfair, some are crucified from birth and those I really feel for.
Certainly opens up discussion points and for that I feel this is a very good piece of writing. Didn't get caught in the rhyming anyway - kept me interested without getting too involved in the words fitting together.