Chapter 19

I felt better now that I had taken a shower, washing away the blood and lingering scent of sulfur. If not for the pink scar at my temple, and the angry slash a cross my back, it might have seemed as if nothing had ever happened; But the memories were still fresh and my back ached every time I moved, the pain was bearable though. The memories, well, they were something I would carry with me for the rest of my life.

Not only was I in danger, but I had brought that danger upon my family as well. I didn't know how Maulice found them, but he had, and now he could use them against me at every turn. Thankfully, Emrys had informed me that Nisorca had used most of her energy healing Josh, and sending him and David both home with no memory of what happened. Which explains why I still had the scars, she didn't have enough energy to heal me completely.

I didn't care thought, as I said, the pain was bearable, and the scars would fade in time, if it meant that Josh and David were safe for the time being, I didnt have any regrets; But despite the fear and worry I was feeling, there was another anxiety trying to consume me. Three words that were repeating themselves over and over in my mind, loader than all the rest.

"I love her." They had spoken together once again.

Those three words scared me, maybe not the same way Maulice did, but I was scared all the same; Because at the time, I had tried to fight the darkness of my own mind to get back to them. To tell them I loved them too, and that couldn't be right. No, it was not the same fear of death, but another kind of fear, and I was not sire which one the lesser of the evils.

I barley knew them, just a few short days we have spent together, and most of it running from danger. There had been no time for small talk, no time to get to know one another, I couldn't tell you what color they liked best; I couldn't tell you if they had ever been hurt, or embarrassed, what they feared and valued. Nor could they do the same for me.

I didn't know who they were as a person. I didn't believe at love at the first sight, maybe lust, but not love. It took time to love someone, they didn't just walk in the door and you were falling, life does not happen like that.

Nisorca had been watching over me all my life, she probably knew more about me than I knew about myself. Yet they had both confessed love in a matter of days, even if they were not aware that I had heard them. In my dream my mother had told me it was okay for me to love them both, but was it true? Maybe I could love them, and them me, but how could there ever be a relationship? It was a laughable thought to imagine the three of us living together.

I wondered how such feelings arose in the middle of such danger, how could you be running for your life at one second, then thinking your in love the next? There were more important things that we should have been thinking about; We needed to make a game plan, figure out where we would go from here.

Yet I still stood in the bathroom, clean and fresh once again, scared to open the door and face the two men on the other side. Scared because I was sitting here, trying to convince myself it was foolish to love them, but the words were still there in my mind. I feared that the moment I faced them, and looked into their eyes, I wouldn't be able to argue about love. That the thoughts and words would die away, and it would just be them.

Not only did I have myself to argue with, but I had to convince them not to take the map from my body. I believed my dream, I had the sick feeling that they would die if I let them take it, and that was a thought I could not bare.

I knew that there would come a time when the danger would end and there would be no need for them to stay. I could handle them leaving of their own choice, but death was not an option, not if I could help it. Though it would be hard to change their minds, I wouldn't stop till I got my way; And if all else failed, I knew Nisorca would not do anything to me if I didn't give permission.

I took in a deep breath, notched my chin up a bit, and pushed open the door, my argument sharp on my tongue; But I didn't get the chance to speak, because the second they saw me emerge from the bathroom they came at me. Emrys from the back, and Kieran from the front, their arms folding over me and each other as well.

I stood there for a moment, almost too shocked to breath. They were hugging me, together, no dirty looks were exchanged, no inhuman growls. They just embraced me together, as if it were the simplest thing in the world; And maybe it was, because at that moment I couldn't think of anything that sounded better.

Which is what I had feared would happen; I almost panicked, almost pushed them away from me, but I stomped the feeling down. I could have died today, I could die tomorrow, or one of them could be taken by death as well. So I pushed away all the fear, the worry and panic and let them hold me. I let them hold me because I might never get the chance to experience it again, and it was worth it.

Two men, from different side of the universe, total opposites of one another. Like night and day, but like with the Yin and Yang, one held a piece of the other inside of them; Emrys an angel, yet there was a darkness in his eyes, hidden behind warm blue skies, was a thunderstorm waiting to strike.

Then there was Kieran, a demon, and here he was hugging me with such gentleness, such kindness and affection. Here they were, here on middle ground, hugging me, Miss Half and Half. I gave a small sigh and smiled, relaxing into their bodies, letting their warmth sooth me and their scent surround me in intoxication.