7. Conspiracy Theory

There is often a thin line between genius and insanity.

“Paranoid schizophrenia. That's what they diagnosed me with,” said Benjamin as they turned the corner and continued toward his apartment building, “I finally got tired of fighting it and just surrendered to it. It was a bit of a relief in some ways.” Ian and Chrissy exchanged glances as he spoke. “For some people it's a real nightmare, but I've learned to live with it.”

“You seem to be coping with it well,” said Ian.

They reached the building and Benjamin began to push his cart up the wheel-chair ramp that led to the front door. “Oh, I have my good days and my bad days,” he continued, “My case is milder than most. It's the paranoia that really gets to me. I always think I'm being watched. And I know I'm just being paranoid, but I can't help it! They gave me pills, but I don't take them. They make me be somebody else. I don't want to be someone else. So as long as the voices don't tell me to harm myself or others, I'm not going to take the pills.”

“Voices?” asked Chrissy.

They entered the lobby and he pushed the shopping cart over to the elevator door and pushed the button. “Of course,” he replied, “Auditory hallucinations are a classic symptom of paranoid schizophrenia.” The elevator door opened and he pushed the cart in while motioning them to stay where they were. He pushed the up button and stepped back out. The door closed and the elevator went up. He motioned for them to follow him to the stairwell.

“Why aren't we taking the elevator?” asked Chrissy.

“I don't trust them,” he answered, “Think about it. There's no frame of reference once you're inside. It may take you up or it may take you down, or it may take you to another universe or dimension. How would you know?”

Ian looked thoughtful. “Hmm... good point,” he replied.

“Now don't you start!” said Chrissy.

“I only hear the voices when it's quiet. Most of the time I can't understand them,” continued Benjamin as they climbed the stairs, “It's like they're muffled. Not muffled really, but like someone's speaking in the next room and you can't quite understand what they're saying. Once in awhile they become very clear, but they don't make much sense.” He stopped when they reached the third floor landing and looked thoughtful. “Yesterday they said, 'Take courage, buy eggs!' What do you suppose they meant by that?”

“How should I know?” answered Chrissy, “They're your voices.”

They stopped at the elevator and he retrieved his shopping cart. “Are you sure that's the same one you put in there?” asked Ian. Chrissy gave him a quick back-hand to the mid-section along with a derisive look.

“Here's my place, such as it is,” said Benjamin as they reached a door about half-way down the hallway. He unlocked the door and they entered. “I'll get some beers,” he called over his shoulder as he headed for the kitchen.

“An old boyfriend?” Ian asked in a hushed tone.

“Why? Jealous?” she smirked.

Ian shrugged. “Not really.”

“Well, you needn't worry. He's gay,” she responded, “You're okay with that aren't you?”

“Chrissy, I'm an artist. Nearly half the people I know are gay.”

“Oh... right.”

They looked around the apartment as they waited for Benjamin to return. It was extremely cluttered with books, magazines and newspapers. There were several filing cabinets with folders stacked on them. One wall had an enormous bookshelf stuffed with books of various sizes. In one corner was a pile of junk that consisted mostly of broken household appliances. Scattered throughout the room were pieces of electronic equipment that Ian couldn't identify.

Benjamin returned with three bottles of beer. Ian was looking over the titles of the books on the bookshelf. “I see you're into conspiracy theories,” he remarked.

Benjamin shrugged. “Yeah.”

“So, who do you think shot JFK?”

“I think Oswald did it alone.”

“Seriously?!” asked Ian with a perplexed look.

“Yep. That's one of those double-reverse conspiracy theories,” he said with conviction. Ian looked puzzled. “You see,” explained Benjamin, “The government throws some 'fake' conspiracy theories out there so that all the conspiracy theorists will waste time trying to prove them while no one pays attention to the real conspiracies.”

“How clever of them,” responded Ian with a touch of sarcasm. He picked a book from the shelf, “How about the moon-landings?”

“Faked,” answered Benjamin, “and by that I mean they were real. The conspiracy was faked. In order for our government to pull off faking those moon-landings the Soviet Union would have had to be in on it, too. The Soviets lost a lot of face by losing the race to the moon. They wouldn't have helped the U.S. with any cover-up about it.”

“Makes sense,” Ian nodded.

“Geez! The two of you could probably go on for hours,” said Chrissy impatiently.

“I'm trying to imagine you with a baby, Chrissy,” Benjamin smiled.

“She's not a baby, she's ten. We adopted her,” Chrissy responded. She held out the memory card. “What do you make of this? We don't know where it came from.”

“You haven't changed,” he replied, taking the card from her and shaking his head with a smile, “Always direct and to the point. No wasting time on small talk.” He sat down at one of three computers that were in his living room and inserted the card. “So... what am I looking at?” he asked when the numerals and letters booted up onto his display.

“We don't know. We think it's some kind of code.”

Benjamin's face lit up. “Seriously?! Where did you get it?”

“I found it in my pocket. I don't know how it got there.”

“Really?! You mean - like - some spy planted it on you or something?!”

Chrissy rolled her eyes. “Don't get excited, Benjamin. I told you everything I know about it. I found it in my pocket and I don't know how it got there.”

“Oh, my God!!” he exclaimed as he scrolled through the characters, “This is... is... delicious!” He suddenly jumped up and ran to the window and peeked out through the blinds. “I wonder if he knows we have this?”

“Who?” asked Chrissy as she came over and looked out the window with him.

“That guy on the corner. See him?” he pointed, “He's been watching my apartment for weeks. I figure I must be getting close to something big.”

“He's a drug dealer, Benjamin.”

“That's what he wants me to think. He even makes fake drug deals.”

“Whatever. Do you think you can figure out what this is?” she pointed at the display.

He sat back down at the computer. His excitement was almost palpable. “Given enough time I can crack anything! We might be onto something huge!” He started tapping madly at the keyboard. “Why, this could be missile launch codes, or the identities of CIA operatives, or Swiss bank account numbers!”

“Or it could be someone's home-made porn that they encrypted,” remarked Ian.

“No way! This is too sophisticated. It isn't just any encryption. This is super high quality! Can I make a copy of this?”

“It's copy protected,” answered Chrissy.

“Really?! God! This just gets better and better!”

“You can hang onto it until you figure it out,” she said.

Benjamin was completely engrossed in his computer. “Great! Thanks!” he said as he tapped at the keys.

“Um... we'll just let ourselves out, then,” said Chrissy.

“Huh? Oh... yeah. See ya,” he replied without taking his eyes off of the monitor.

They left and started down the stairs. “I hope he remembers to eat and sleep. He can get pretty obsessive about things sometimes,” Chrissy said, “One time he ended up getting a kidney infection because he wouldn't take the time to go to the bathroom.”

“He's a colorful character alright,” responded Ian, “I've never met anyone who had conspiracy theories about conspiracy theories before. Think he can figure that card out?”

“If anybody can, he can. I'll feel a lot better when I know what's on it.”

“I'm not so sure I want to know anymore.”

Author's Note

I rewrote this chapter several times. I realize that for some people mental illness is not a laughing matter and I tried to be sensitive to that.

Suggestions and constructive criticisms are always welcome.

Reviews

[Megan R. Toy]

I was completely engrossed in this piece. It captivated me from the very beginning and pulled me in until I finished. Benjamin is a very likable character and gives the chapter a lot of color. I almost began believing him! You really shed a lot of light on the mental illness and helped me to really grasp what it is like to have schizophrenia. I thoroughly enjoyed reading this chapter. I can't wait to read more of Benjamin, Chrissy, and Ian!

[Craig2591]

Thank you very much. I'm afraid Benjamin only makes one more small appearance in the story but he was so popular with readers that if I ever do a re-write I will give him a bigger part. I hope you go to the beginning of the story but you can also continue it from here and I think you can follow it without being too confused.

[C. Rose]

Great way to start a chapter.

I am skeptical that despite being married, Chrissy didn't know if Ian was homophobpic or not.
That's so true about elevators!
Really enjoying the character Benjamin.
I feel like you are taking Paranoid Schizophrenia seriously, but still giving Benjamin his own identity. Bravo.
I feel like Ian represents normality: the way he interacts with Benjamin and his last line questioning their continued involvement in the plot.

[Craig2591]

You're probably right about Chrissy not knowing Ian's feelings about gay people, but I myself am an artist and I wanted to use his remark about knowing so many gays. Thanks.

[Maggie]

This is great. A few grammar mistakes here and there, but otherwise this piece is witty and humorous. I had fun reading this

[Craig2591]

Thank you very much. I'm glad you enjoyed it.

[Gembro99]

This was very fascinating!

[Craig2591]

Thank you. I don't think it's exactly what you wanted for the contest, but I thought I'd give it a try anyway.

[K.]

I enjoyed the stuff about the voices. As you said, mental illnesses' aren't laughing matters but you made it interesting to read and enjoy, as strange as that sounds. I hope you keep going with the voices, I think it could lead to something interesting and you definitely have the talent to make them well written; but it is your story, not mine.

[Tina Kline]

I enjoyed this chapter. Very entertaining and believable. Benjamin is a very likeable character. Wonder what he is going to find.

[Craig2591]

Thank you.

[Barbara Walker]

I think you did a great balancing act. I know some people who can get obsessive who have not been diagnosed with a mental illness! Your description of Benjamin is so good, I felt like I was standing in there watching him the entire time. Great dialogue, as usual. Can't wait to read more!

[Craig2591]

I'm glad you enjoyed it.

[John Lauterbach]

I like Ben a lot, he stands out to me as a great character. Because of his paranoia you have a cool/easy way to insert foreshadowing while the audience might dismiss him or take everything he says seriously. I'd have a lot of fun messing with my readers via his paranoia. I also loved that line about the eggs. It's weird and funny and nonsensical, and most of all, Ben knows it's ridiculous. I don't know anyone with schizophrenia, but I imagine that's what it's like - not the Hollywood schizophrenia where the voices tell you to do things and you're compelled to obey.

Also, I like how well he gets along with Ian. Great chapter, I hope Ben sticks around in some capacity.

[Craig2591]

Ben will make another appearance. There is a lot of potential with his character. I'm having a lot of fun with this story. I'd like to write another when it's done. Perhaps get Meredith and Chrissy involved together in a mystery. Ben would have to play a role in it of course.

Thanks for the review.