The Serene Sea : pg 8

   The girl said fiercely “You shouldn’t be saying sorry to me. This only happened to me today. You should be apologizing to the sea that you so often hurt with your pebbles. There are other sea creatures than me down there.”

Versai was baffled by what she said. He thought “Other sea creatures than her? How is she a sea creature?” He saw a moment later what she meant by that when he saw a flash of her fish tail as she jumped back into the ocean. “You're a..a mermaid ??!!”

The mermaid said “Yeah, and what of it ?”

And she began swimming away but Versai then called out to her “Wait! What is your name? ”

She smiled and said “Serene. This won’t be the last time we meet so I’ll ask your name then.” She then dove beneath the sea.

Author's Note

I am having a little trouble with dialogue format...is this correct?

Reviews

[Theresa]

The dialogue is fine. You just have to start a new line/paragraph when a new person speaks which you did. It helps the reader follow who's speaking easier. nI really liked this chapter especially how Serene tells him he should be apologizing to the sea.