Chapter 18

Cabin

      

       I had the address memorized, but I found myself checking it a few more times as I rode the bike down the coast.  When Mave said it was a remote location he wasn't kidding.  I had stopped to fill up when I saw a gas station/ tackle depot that looked to be the last stop until I reached the exit.  Now I was coasting and waiting for the sign to turn, which I found not too long after.  I turned onto the gravel drive, cursing that it wasn't paved. 

       I approached the house, cars overflowing into the wild forest, looking just as out of place than if there was a Walmart out here.  The music was blaring, a deep and sweaty type of funk music that made me think of Logan of all things.  I parked the bike off to the side, going the extra step to hide it in a deep brush area so that no one could mess with it.  That bike was the only thing I owned, and I was clinging to it like a child does its blanket.

       I took a second to grab my bag and gather my thoughts.  The past week at school had been hectic but overall not too bad.  I was getting into something of a routine, even if coming back to a house full of people was an adjustment.  Dante was noticeably absent, having been called away for work, so I had one less person to worry about upsetting while I was there.  West, well, he was a different story entirely.  We didn't talk much, and outside of one late night when we both couldn't sleep, I hadn't run across him too much.  I still had the nightmares, which always drew a crowd, and I vowed to go back on my medication when I got more settled in school, the look on Madlens face the last time was enough to make me want it despite its side effects. 

       Logan and Mave were my two bright lights in all this.  They seemed to go out of their way to include me, teasing me when I needed it and giving me practical advice about teachers.  I ate with them the rest of the week, and unfortunately for me Raquel was now back in rotation, though it was noted that she and West weren't exactly winning couple of the year.  They fought more often than not, and I knew most of them were about me living a mere thirty feet from him.

       Seth and Madlen were surprises, and I found myself seeking out their time more often than not.  Madlen even took me shopping one night, refusing to allow me to pay for anything and doting on me like she would her own child.  I tried not to be too awkward, but it was a like a childhood fantasy come to life, every bit as ridiculous as a child getting her own unicorn.  She was wonderful, and was about as honest and real as I would have wanted in a mother type figure, if that's what she was to me now.   Seth was more strong and silent, but I found I could make him laugh.  I did my drink trick with him in the mornings, he would always crack a smile and salute me afterwards.  I found myself telling really bad jokes, and insert stupid puns where I could because he would always throw his head back and laugh.  It was strange and wonderful in equal parts, sometimes making me so sad I would cry a little.  Seth caught me on night before I could catch myself, kissing the top of my head and leaving me be.  I was beginning to feel happy there, and that scared the ever loving hell out of me.

       I took another breath, mentally pulled up my big girl panties, and walked towards the house.  There wasn't anyone on the porch, but most of the noise was coming from inside the house so I opened the door hoping against hope that there was going to be Mave or Logan within sight. 

       Instead I ran into Raquel, who looked about as happy to see me as a dying man would be to see the reaper.  She refused to move so I could pass, making me squeeze around her and the entryway table to get by.  There was no hitting, or spitting, so I considered this a small victory.  I scanned the room, not recognizing anyone in particular.  I got a few more head nods in passing than I was predicting I would, making me wonder if I was finally making some social headway in all of this.  I saw more people flooding downstairs, so I dragged me and all my stuff down the narrow spiral stairs that headed downstairs.  When I got to the landing I squealed, noticing Mave had scooped me up and thrown me over his shoulder, to playfully swat my but.

       "Cheese!" he yelled, a play on a none to welcome nickname.  "Logan, the cheese is here!" he exclaimed, clearly about three sheets to the wind at this point.  I had left pretty soon after five, and it was still a good four our drive to get out here.  That put me here about nine, and it looked like the party was in full swing.  I saw Logan, red faced and dragging a cute girl behind him over to where we were. 

       "You know what Mave, she's never been to the cabin before.  We should give her the full...tour and experience don't you think?" Logan asked, words running a bit close together. 

       "I don't need the experience!" I yelled to Mave's back, trying to squirm out.  I snapped my finger, replacing their hands with beers in the hopes they would get distracted.  It worked the last time.

       "To cheese!" the guys said laughing as they downed their drinks.  Damn, talk about your all time backfires.  Mave threw the beer in the recycling bin and continued his ascent of the stairs towards the back of the house.  Once the campfire and pool water smell hit my nose I knew what was going to happen to me. 

       "I don't need a tour guys, really," I said pleading and turning my head to appeal to Logan.  I could always count on his mercy.  They made no move to stop their walk towards the pool and all I could think about was my boots.

       "My boots, they're for riding," I said, making perfect sense to me.  The guys roared with laughter, it was so hard Mave almost dropped me on my head. 

       "A little help West!  The lady requires assistance, her boots, which are made for riding, are about to get a little wet," he said, and I could feel my heart stop.  I was upside down, and facing Mave's back, but I could still feel a pair of familiar hands undoing the laces of my motorcycle boots with a measured slowness.  He made no comment, no joke, he just very slowly unlaced my feet and took them over to a side beach chair next to the pool.  I heard them count to three, in what was very incorrect German, and the next thing I knew I was underwater. 

       I resurfaced, feeling exposed but almost buoyant at the boys’ easy manner.  I could see West smiling on, more as a spectator as a participant and I nodded at his direction to Mave who picked up my meaning quickly.

       "Don't even think about it," West warned, backing up from where Mave was.  After a quick wrestling demonstration, and the clearly more sober West taking control, it became obvious that he wasn't going in willingly.  Mave shrugged and cannon-balled into the pool next to me, soaking my head again.  He swam over to me, pushing a strand of hair out of my face and tucking it behind my ear. 

       "I'm glad you're not one of those girls that needs five pounds of makeup to go out, you'd look like a drowned raccoon at this point, like the rest of them" Mave said gesturing towards the others, and dunking my head under again.  I came back up, and he, Logan, and I played like children for a while.  We did water races, chicken fights, and handstand contests until we were all panting with exertion.  I couldn't remember the last time I let loose like this, with people I trusted.  I stopped suddenly, snapping my fingers and filling their hands with shots.  They waited, trained enough to want a toast.

       "You want a toast?" I asked in a demanding voice.

       "Yes, Mam," Logan chirped out with a burp that made us laugh.  I took a deep breath, gathering myself for it.

       "Here's to the four hinges of Friendship-

       Swearing, Lying, Stealing and Drinking.

       When you swear, swear by your magic;

       When you lie, lie for a pretty woman,

       When you steal, steal away from bad company

       And when you drink, drink with me."

       I downed my shot, in return and filling our hands with one more.  In unison we did the same again, and I looked back up to them feeling good.  I placed one hand on each of their chests, feeling the need to express how I was really feeling to them.  I transferred to them, pouring out my appreciation and affection of them a little stronger than normal.  They went stock still, eyes staring into mine like they held the secrets to the universe.

       "I'm sorry that's a buzz kill, I have to remember you all don't do that kind of thing," I said, removing my hand only to have it snagged back by both of them.

       "Do it again," Logan said, trying to focus on me more.  I sent it out again, this time trying to send them some pictures.  I knew it was possible but I hadn't ever tried it with someone.  The one image I sent them was of the three of us laughing at lunch the other day, talking about an episode of one of our favorite shows.  It was the first time I felt really a part of them, and them of me. 

       I dropped my hands when I was done, feeling a bit lost for words.  I heard someone cough behind me, West was standing and looking down on us from the pool deck.  It was far too tempting, the drinks were far too enticing, to allow him to brood up there all by himself.  I pulled myself out of the water, like I was getting out, using every last scrap of feminine wiles I had to attract his gaze.  West turned in my direction, a war going on behind his eyes as he took in my wet jeans and t-shirt.  I reached over, pretending to dust something off his shirt, and then threw him in the water by his friends.  It was my turn to look down on them, Mave and Logan taking turns dunking him in the pool and jumping on each other.  I laughed, turning to find my boots and a towel.  They deserved a little time together, I hadn't seen them doing that much this past week, and I had a feeling it was what West needed the most.

       "Munster!" I heard Mave call, and I snapped my fingers over my shoulder to pop a shot in each of their hands as I walked inside to at least put on a suit.

       I weaved my way through the crowd, muttering apologies as I tried to keep my head down enough to stay under the radar.  Just as I made my way towards what looked like the bathroom I was met with someone.  It looked like Raquel but I knew it was her sister Jackie.  The sneer was like a mini version of hers, not quite as sure or as vicious, just a bad imitation of her sister’s considerable wrath.

       "Move please," I said, proud of myself for not hitting her like I wanted to.

       "It's pathetic, he just feels bad for you.  He was telling my sister that the other night, how awful he felt for you.  That no one wants to take you in.  Don't mistake his kindness for affection, he has a thing for lost puppies," she said giggling.  I rolled my eyes.

       "That's all you got, man you are a poor man's Raquel. Your sister would have done better than that.  My parentage isn't a secret, if you’re going to go after someone point to something they are trying to hide.  Like in this instance I would say to you that if your sister isn't careful, perhaps I might start digging into her past.  Like, perhaps what happened to her last summer?  I bet that is just one big secret waiting to be unleashed."  She didn't move, just stared at me with wide eyes and a pale face.

       "You’re evil," she said, stumbling over her words to find the right adjective.

       "Says the sister of someone who lied to everyone," I said, closing the door in her face and basking in the moment for a minute before returning to the party.

       ***

    

       I woke up the next morning, on the bathroom floor of one of the guest bedrooms.  I had another dream, but no one was running in to check on me, so either I was too drunk to get that far or they were too drunk to notice my screams.  I sat up carefully taking the time to allow my head to adjust to being vertical once again.  I thumped two bodies on either side of me in my attempt to sit up, and a quick scan around me reminded me it was Mave and Logan.  I used their sleeping bodies to sit up higher, going for a better look around the room. 

       Thankfully they were only ones I was sharing the small bathroom with, and it should have worried me that I didn't recall either the reason or the means for me getting here but I simply didn't.  I dragged myself to standing, using the vanity as leverage.  I had to step over Logan in the process but managed to make it to the sink without waking either of them up.  I scanned my face and almost laughed out loud.  My hair was a complete mess, sticking up in all sorts of strange directions, and my eyes were about as blood red as a vamp.  I washed my face, and lamented I didn't have my bag with me so I could brush the dead animal taste out of my mouth.  With that thought I exited the bathroom and found West sprawled out on the bed, his upper body devoid of either a shirt or the bed sheet.  I stared at him for a while, taking in the planes and shadows that lined his chest and abdominals, admiring his form.

       "Take a picture, it'll last longer," Mave said from behind me.  It startled me, but I found it hard to take my eyes off of West.

       "I should," I answered him with an honesty that made us both uncomfortable.  I felt Mave move to stand beside me, suppressing a chuckle when he got a good look at his friend.  "You want to tell me why I was sandwiched in between you two last night in the bathroom of all places?" I asked him, finally tearing my eyes off West and walking back towards the couch that lined the opposite wall.  Mave plopped down beside me, thumping his feet to rest on the small coffee table in front of us.  It was a testament to what we did last night that West didn't move.

       "Logan and I carried you to bed around two, and when I placed you in bed you kept crawling back to the bathroom and laying on the floor.  I thought you wanted to puke but you just laid with your cheek to the tile and screamed whenever anyone got close to you.  Eventually I laid down next to you and passed out, Logan came in later and did the same," Mave said, in a tone that more than suggested it wasn't the whole story.

       "Why did you carry me to bed?" I asked bluntly, wanting to know if I had to do any damage control this morning.  Mave sighed, looking to where West was laying.  "Great, anything I need to worry about?" I asked wondering what I could have done to have had Mave take me to bed.

       "No, I scooped you up before you said anything too bad.  But for future reference, he really hates it when you dig in his head.  Last night wasn't the right time to try and figure out what he's thinking," Mave said as I sat forward and put my head in my hands. 

       "I'm about three times as reckless with my magic when I drink," I said trying to explain myself.  "I tend to just do what I want, and I can count on two hands the amount of times it's landed me in some serious trouble."  I sat back, closing my eyes and feeling so very tired again.

       "Well, we didn't really help things last night by feeding you all those shots.  Logan and I had a hard time keeping up with you, which is saying something kid," he said, yawning something huge on the end of the sentence. 

       "Nothing much else to do in the trailer park."  I thought back to that place, our old trailer.  I didn't know how to think about it anymore, it was wrong to think of it as something comforting but I couldn't help it.

       "What was it like living out of one, traveling all the time?" Mave asked, bringing me out of my head.

       "It was interesting and never dull, but my experiences there weren't very positive Mave.  There are more painful memories than happy ones."  I felt an arm and realized Mave had pulled me to him, tucking me into his side.  I stiffened on the initial contact, unsure how to proceed.  The warmth of his body spoke to my own and I melted into his body, relaxing and enjoying someone near me for once.

       "It wasn't all bad, the holidays were a big deal, and then when I had JP life for me meant something else entirely.  I don’t' think he understands how close I was to the edge before he showed up."  I shivered, remembering the darker days I had there, isolated against the sane minds.

       "The MacKinnons do holidays big too.  My parents and Logan's are always away, we are both the youngest so Seth and Madlen have taken us in as their own."  There wasn't much sadness in his tone, but I knew from experience the lengths that a parent’s neglect can reach far past the surface.

       "I remember one Christmas we stayed at one of my father's girlfriend’s houses for her traditional Christmas dinner.  It was the first time I remember having a formal sit down meal.  It was a disaster," I said, laughing and shaking my head the memory of her staring me while I asked to use the restroom in the middle of dinner.  "All I wanted to do was take a bath, we only ever had showers or what my father called w***e's baths.  You know in the sink?" I said, more to myself than Mave who went still beside me.  "It was this big Jacuzzi tub, and when I pressed these buttons the water would shoot out.  I sat in it for almost four hours, it was the best Christmas I can remember."  I didn't mean for it sound pathetic, knowing it did but meaning it sincerely nonetheless.

       "Well my father just sends money.  We throw a big party with it, it's the highlight of the season," he said proudly, and I could hear it in his tone.

       "I hope I make it then," I said.

       "Of course you will.  We wouldn't dare leave you out, you’re the life of the party now little cheese head," he said, ruffling my hair on my head.

       "I meant... never mind," I said, not wanting to voice what I really intended by my comment.

       "We won't let him touch you Brielle, none of us will let them get to you," he said, knowing what I meant, and reassuring me all the same.

       "Let's hope it never gets to that, and the vamps in Mexico lop off his head before it gets to that."  I laughed at the mental picture, willing it will all my power to come true.

       "That would cut through some red tape huh?" He asked, looking down on me with affection.  I yawned with Mave in tandem, sending a deep chuckle through him as I felt my eyelids droop some more.

       "Go on and sleep," he told me when I moved to get away.  I hesitated, frozen and unfamiliar with the idea of sleeping next to Mave.  It felt right, and since I was trying to go with my gut I let him hold me.  "I have you now, sleep," he said gently, laying back and lying next to me.  I took a deep breath, turning my head to see the hard outline of West's jaw, wondering for second if he was awake enough to hear what we talked about, and then promptly fell asleep.