Chapter Sixteen

Mackenzie’s POV

            Today’s the day. I have to face him again for the first time since the last time we were in a court room. The only reason I’m even going through with all of this is because I don’t want him getting the twins. I don’t want him seeing them or touching them or even looking at them. He doesn’t deserve it. I know people tell me that they’re his kids too, but he tried killing them. Shouldn’t that be attempted murder or something? I don’t understand how he can just get off, because his family has money.

            I’m just glad that Conner and Anya aren’t going to be here. As much as I would love their cuddles, it’s not the place for them. Babies shouldn’t be around negativity. Babies are soft and bring joy into peoples’ lives. Okay, it’s 11:55. Five more minutes. I can handle this.

            I pull my phone out briefly when I feel the vibration in my pocket.

            From Ade <3: Has he shown up yet?

            To Ade <3: No. At least I haven’t seen him yet. He has five more minutes though.

            From Ade <3: Don’t freak out, baby. The judge isn’t going to let him have even visitation with the babies. He doesn’t deserve it.

            To Ade <3: I wish you were here with me. :’(

            From Ade <3: I wish I was there too, but we both agreed that this would be the best.

            “Do you want me to come to the court date with you?” I look up from my book and see Ade walking into the bedroom, throwing her hair up in a messy bun for bed. I save my spot before putting my book down on the side table and face her. We’re both sitting crisscross applesauce on the full bed, having the twins and Autumn fall asleep in our room the last night at the cabin.

            “Of course I would want you there, because you’re my girlfriend, but you don’t have to be there. I wouldn’t make you do something you’re uncomfortable with.”

            “Oh, it’s not that I’m uncomfortable. I just don’t know if I’ll be able to hold myself back if he steps out of line.” I start to laugh, but quickly notice that Adrianna is serious and gazing down at the sleeping kids. “I would do anything to protect you three, you know that right? After Autumn, you three are my priorities, and it just makes me furious that someone could hurt you all like that and I wasn’t there to protect you.”

            I quickly run my thumb across her cheek to dry her tears. “Hey now, none of that. If I have to accept that I couldn’t have done anything, then you need to as well. He’s wrong in the brain, Ade. He’s an angry person who doesn’t know how to control his temper.”

            “How the hell could he do that to you though? After all the s**t you’ve been through in your life and you’re still the nicest person to everyone! You’re still forgiving him after what he did!”

            “Because I can’t change it, baby. Yea, there are days where I just want to cry and feel sorry for myself, but I only allow myself to cry for three minutes. Then I pick myself up and hug my beautiful babies and thank God that they are in my life. That everyone is in my life, because to me that’s what’s important. Right now. This moment.”

            Adrianna is quiet for a couple minutes while I allow her to think about what she wants to say or do. I just continue to rub my thumb over her leg until she’s ready to talk again.

            “Do you think I could watch the twins for you that day? I know your family and Lea are all going to be there with you, so it kind of just leaves me. That’ll give me something positive to do instead of sitting at home thinking about punching him over and over again.”

            “Yea, I mean, I was going to ask Lea and Dianna if they wanted to, but if you want to that’d be awesome! You can bring Autumn over to my house, that way we can all meet there when we’re done.”

            “Okay.”

To Ade <3: I know, but can’t I change my mind?

            From Ade <3: You can, but it’s too late now, plus Anya and Autumn are being fussy. Conner is forever the calm one. LOL! I gotta go and so do you. I’ll be right here waiting when you come home. :)

            To Ade <3: Okay. <3

            Before we head into the conference room, I quickly pull Naya into a hug. We don’t say anything, but I cling to my sister, breathing in her familiar smell, and try to calm down. She’s not allowed in the room. Only people who are is me, my lawyer, and mama. So that leaves papa, Naya, Mychal, Heather, and Lea out in the lobby until everything is finished.

            “Come on, sweetie. You gotta go in there, okay?” She takes my face gently in her hands and moves my head to look at her. “We all love you and we’ll be right here when you’re done.”

            I slowly nod my head and respond with a barely audible, “I love you, too.”

            I walk into the room between my lawyer and mama and sit down on one side of the long table. The room is bare. Just a couple plaques on the walls. The American and state flags are hanging in the back corner. The judge doesn’t even have a special chair like in the movies. Just white walls and a wooden table with eight chairs around it.

            We all take our seats when the stenographer comes in and sets up her equipment at the end of the table to our right. That’s when the door opens again and I feel my heart drop. I can’t lose it today. I have to remain strong and just focus on my breathing. When he walks in with his lawyer and his dad, I feel mama’s thumb start gentle circles on my right leg. Focus on the circles. Focus on the circles.

            He walks in like he owns the place and the look of satisfaction he gives me when we make eye contact makes me want to throw up. Instead I shut my eyes tight and focus on the circles and my breathing. I imagine Ade’s heartbeat against my fingers, steady and calming. I open my eyes again when I hear the judge walk in.

            The beginning of the meeting is the same as last with vows of truth and everything. It wasn’t until the judge asked for any objections to my restraining order for the twins that something shifted in the room.

            “I want visitation rights.”

            In that moment, I didn’t black out. I didn’t break down…

            I saw red.

            “How f*****g dare you?” I scream at him across the table, jumping out of my seat in the process. “You tried to murder them while they were inside me! You didn’t give a damn about them during the last eight months! And you have the balls to ask to see them? No. No, I won’t allow it.”

            “Well, guess what, Kenzie. It’s not up to you.” He whispers across the table with a smug look of victory on his face. I want to smack him, but also throw up. I never liked when he used my nickname. It always sounded wrong falling off his lips. Like a poison I never wanted to experience.

            All I want to do is jump across the table and punch him. I’ve never in my life felt hatred towards someone like I do right now. I’m physically shaking. My nails are digging into my palms in fists, because I’m trying to keep calm. If I lose it anymore, the judge isn’t going to see me in a good light.

            “Those twins are just as much my DNA as they are yours and I wish to be a good dad and see my kids. You know, give them a taste of the good life. Just because you think you’re on some sort of high horse, because you’re a wannabe Rivera, doesn’t mean you deserve everything you want in life, Kenz.”

            I slam my eyes close and shake my head and will the tears not to spring forward. I can feel my palms starting to bleed from how tight I have my fists clenched. I cannot stop shaking at this point and I just want to get out of the room. I need air. I need Ade. I just want to go home and cuddle with my babies and forget about this worthless excuse of a man sitting across from me right now.

            “You will never be a father to my kids. You’re nothing but a sperm donor, as far as I’m concerned. You’re right, I don’t deserve everything I want in life, but I didn’t want or deserve anything you gave me except for those babies. I didn’t want or deserve you throwing me against a wall for hanging out with my friends. I didn’t want or deserve you choking me for making the wrong food for a date. I didn’t want or deserve you punching me in the stomach when I told you about the babies that you apparently want now. I didn’t want or deserve any of that and just because you were raised with a silver spoon in your mouth, doesn’t mean you get everything you want either!

            This isn’t a game, Kyle! Anya was in the NICU for the first two weeks of her life. She was struggling to breathe and to eat! They were born five weeks early, because of the stress I was under during my pregnancy. These are babies! They’re human and fragile and need love always and need attention at the drop of a hat. They laugh and cry and eat and poop. They’ll melt your heart with just one look, but they can get loud and messy too. You know you can’t handle that and you don’t want it! You want something over my head. You want to keep me in this never-ending game that I didn’t want to play in the first place! Leave my kids and my family and I alone and we can all move on with our lives!”

            I finally take in a deep breath and sit down, because apparently I had stood up again at some point. I refocus on the circles and try and imagine Ade’s heartbeat against my, now numb, fingers.

            “Alright you two, that’s enough. Mr. Sampson, I understand that these children are your DNA.” Kyle’s smug look grows and I cannot believe what I’m hearing right now. “But, frankly, I don’t give a damn about that.” The blonde’s face across from me fell and I feel slightly better about what’s going to happen. “DNA doesn’t make a father, neither does money. Children don’t need a ‘taste of the good life.’ They need love and commitment. So, here’s your choices. If you really want these children in your life, not for publicity, not to make yourself feel better, if you really want to take care of them, here are your choices..”

            He’s giving him choices? How? Why? He tried killing his own children! Who is going to protect them now that they’re born. Me! I need to protect them from their own DNA. It’s disgusting. He doesn’t need choices. He needs to be shut down.

            I am trying so hard to focus on the judge, but everything seems to be blurry. There are so many emotions and feelings I’m going through right now, both mentally and physically, that I can’t focus on just one thing. My palms are stinging from the sweat mixing in the cuts from my nails. My whole body is starting to hurt from how tense I am, but I can’t seem to relax. I’m nervous and scared and I just want to go home, but I want to know the verdict for my babies’ futures.

            “Option one: You start showing commitment. You need some serious anger management classes and some financial planning classes. Also, you’ll need to start paying child support, because even if you get visitation down the line, no judge in their right mind will allow you to have full custody. That means, until those children are eighteen, you will be paying for part of their living expenses.

            You have one month to show me that you are enrolled in those classes and start paying Ms. Jackson child support. Then, and only then, will I reconsider visitation rights. Until then, the restraining order stays on Ms. Jackson and one is extended to both children. Option two is you leave this woman and her children alone, indefinitely, and you go about your life, gallivanting around New York City with your parents money, illegal alcohol use, and all the gold-digging women that already consume your daily life currently.

            The choice is yours Mr. Sampson. Don’t string three innocent people along in your attempt to get some sick entertainment in your life. That is my ruling. Case dismissed.”

            Case dismissed. That’s it. My children’s future was just determined in twenty minutes. Twenty minutes for the judge to decide that Kyle’s a good enough guy to have a chance with his kids. The kids he doesn’t even really want.

            The judge leaves and I feel Mama wrap her arms around me and stand me up, her left arm never leaving my waist. My eyes are dry. I’m not crying anymore; just staring at nothing in particular. My hands are still in fists, but I can’t bring myself to relax. I’m pulled into a hug and I can tell it’s Mychal, but I can’t lift my arms; like all my strength has left my body.

            Naya pulls me into her side and we walk to the car. I can barely hear Mama telling them what happened in the room. It just sounds like I’m underwater; all muffled and distant. I climb into the back of the car with Naya. Mychal kissing me on the forehead before closing the door and heading to his car with Lea. I just want us to be back at my house, but it’s about a thirty minute drive.

            I rest my head against the window, not caring about the sun in my eyes. I focus on the minutes until we’re home and hear my family talking quietly in the car. I feel myself starting to relax when I hear Naya exclaim.

            “Kenzie, what happened?” I slowly move to look at her, my energy quickly leaving me. Her eyes don’t lock with mine though and my wrists are being grabbed. I look down and see just how much damage I’ve done to my hands. Four gashes across each palm and blood running down the sides of my hands and fingers. “Mom, dad, we need to clean her hands up and get some bandages for her palms. The cuts look deep.”

            It takes all my energy to pull my hands out of hers and to ignore the look of hurt that flashes across my sister’s face. I don’t want to be babied right now. I just want to be alone. I want to kiss my babies and then I want to take a shower and cry and sleep.

            “Naya, we’ll figure it out when we get there.” I glance up to lock eyes with Mama, but look away at the disappointed and sad expression I receive. I close my eyes for the rest of the drive and try my best to tune out the feeling of everyone’s eyes on me.

            When we get to my house, I see that Mychal and Lea are walking in. I open my door and walk up to the house by myself, ignoring the calls from the three family members behind me. I walk through my front door and see Adrianna sitting on the recliner.

            Her hair is up in a bun, so I know the twins just ate because she doesn’t like it when they spit up in her hair. She’s not wearing makeup either, which is rare for her outside of her own house, but I’m glad she’s comfortable in my house and around my family. Her oversized dance shirt is hanging off her shoulder revealing her sports bra and undershirt straps and her leggings are bright blue, one of my favorite colors.

            But even with how beautiful and perfect she looks, when all I want to do is kiss her and tell her how much she means to me and how happy I am to have her in my life… The tears start to fall and I rush to her, falling into her arms and crying on her shoulder, clinging to her as if she was my life force.

            I’m not sure how long I cry before falling asleep in her lap, but she holds me the whole time. Gently rubbing my back and hair and quietly shh-ing me and whispering positive things into my ear. My sobs slowly turn into hiccups and silent tears and I eventually fall into a restless sleep.

            “Mommy, you push me on the swing, please?” I look up from the book I’m reading on the blanket and smile at my little boy. He’s such a beach boy with his long, perfectly straight blonde hair that lays just past his ears. His white, rainbow tank top stained brown from playing in the sand with his sisters. His ‘puppy sister’ Dory right at his side looking a little worse for wear having to keep up with all three toddlers at the park for the last hour.

            “Of course, baby boy. Where’s mama and your sisters?” I pick up the three year old and kiss his forehead before calling the two month old Golden Retriever puppy to follow us. I quickly see Adrianna who smiles and winks at me before corralling Autumn and Anya off in the opposite direction. We’ve always had a rule between us to give the kids independence, but not without a watchful eye. One of us has to have an eye on the kids at all times, because you never know what could happen in a second you aren’t looking.

            “Anya had to go potty and Autumn didn’t wanna swing.” He says while resting his head on my shoulder. I pull my phone out and see that it’s almost two o’clock, the kids’ naptime.

            “Okay. We’re going to be at the park for ten more minutes and then it’s time to go home, alright?”

            “Okay, mommy.” He says through a yawn and I smile again at just how adorable he is. A couple minutes into swinging, I see my three girls come out of the bathroom, Autumn and Anya turning to Ade, who looks at me. I nod, understanding that she’s going to send them by themselves to me. We aren’t that far apart, only about 20 yards. I smile at Ade who turns towards the ice cream stand at the other end of the park.

            “Mommyyyy!” Conner’s cries fill my ears as I look down and see him on the ground having fallen off of the swing. Luckily, I wasn’t pushing him too high and he’s more shocked than hurt. Nevertheless, he’s still my baby and it still hurts to see him cry.

            Just as I’m picking him up, I feel Autumn run into my legs, hugging me tight. Her curly, black hair that falls onto her shoulders is bouncing with every movement. Her caramel skin tone contrasting perfectly with her brother’s milky complexion. “Hi mommy! Did Conner get hurted?” She frowns.

            “Hurt, not hurted, but he’s okay, baby girl; just a little scared. Where’s your sister?” I look around for Anya, but there’s no sign of her. I hug Conner against me tighter, his cries subsiding, and his head resting on my shoulder again, before looking down at my oldest. “Where’s Anya?”

            “She was right behind me. I promise!” Her wide eyes looking all over the park for her other half. “Anya!”

            “Baby, you know you’re supposed to hold your brother and sister’s hands when they walk with you. They’re little. They don’t know better yet.”

            “I’m sorry, mommy!” Autumn cries, tears starting to stream down her face as she looks around to try and spot the familiar head of blonde hair and matching polka dot dress. I take her hand and we start walking the path that Autumn had just taken before running into Ade who quickly picks up the crying four year old and hugs her.

            “What’s wrong? Wait, where’s Anya?” Instantly scanning the surroundings for our youngest and smallest child.

            “She didn’t come over to me with Autumn.”

            “Autumn June, mommy and I tell you all the time to hold your sister’s hand! Why didn-.”

            “Not now! Please, we have to fi-.”

            Just then, it was like my heart was ripped in two. I spot my baby being dragged by someone. A man. They’re walking in the opposite direction. My baby, bless her heart, is trying to put up as much a fight as a thirty pound little girl can against a grown man. I quickly push Conner into Ade’s free arm, resulting in a whine from the almost asleep boy. I start running for my daughter.

            “Hey!” As I yell it, the man turns around. It can’t be. He wouldn’t. Why would he kidnap my baby?

            “Hey, mister! I ‘long to my mommies! Put me down! Mommyyyy! Mamaaaa!”

I wake up screaming and shaking. My eyes not opening right away. “He’s taking her! He’s taking my baby!”

            “Kenzie, stop. It was a dream! Mackenzie!” I open my eyes, still trembling with fear and looking around the room frantically to figure out where I am. “Kenzie, it was a nightmare. You’re safe. The babies are safe. No one is going to hurt them. Shhh.. Shhh..”

            Ade attempts to hold me again, but I shoot out of the recliner and beeline for the nursery, knowing my babies are sleeping, but just needing to hold them and make sure they’re okay. I slowly open the door and am surprisingly greeted by two awake blondes. I pick them both up and cradle them into my chest, walking towards my room.

            I lay on the bed with both of them next to me and turn onto my side to face them. I could watch them all day, even though they’re not even a month old. They are just so unique and special even if they look alike. The three of us are in the room for about ten minutes before Ade walks in.

            “Hey, baby.” She kisses my forehead and my eyes instinctively flutter close at the touch. Before she can pull completely away, I pull her back in for another kiss. “You want to tell me what happened today?” She asks against my lips and my exhale before opening my eyes to look into my favorite brown orbs.

            I’ve always loved looking at Ade, but her eyes are definitely my favorite part about her. From a distance, her eyes just look like any other brown eyes you’ve seen, but up close, where I see them.. they aren’t. They are such a creamy shade of brown, almost like melted milk chocolate, but then towards the pupil are tiny hazel specks. They’re beautiful.

            “I’m sure my family already told you.” I rest my head against the pillow again, the brunette laying across from me on the other side of the twins, but she shakes her head.

            “They offered, but I told them that I wanted you to tell me.”

            “Why?”

            “Well, you are my girlfriend, not them, and with the way you came home, I know it wasn’t anything good and being this close to you and the babies will help keep me more calm.”

            “Well, the judge extended my restraining order and made one for Conner and Anya.”

            “That’s good, babe!”

            “Yea, but he gave him a choice.” My voice cracks and I feel tears start stinging my eyes again.

            “What kind of choice?”

            “He has the choice to either go to anger management and start showing commitment to them or he leaves us alone. I don’t even want child support. I don’t care about it. I just want him out of our lives. I told him in there, I said that they’re babies and they need love and attention and he doesn’t want that. Even the judge told him off, but he wants to play a game that I don’t want to play. He wants them just to get at me.

            “That’s kind of what my dream was about. Th-that he took Anya. She was so little, but she was fighting him and yel-yelling for me and I couldn’t get to her.” I start choking on my words, but I have to finish the story. “W-we were at the park and I was pushing Conner on-on the sw-swing and the girls were running from you to me, but then Conner fe-fell a-and then Autumn came running up, b-but Anya was gone!”

            I open my eyes and see through my tears that Ade is also crying. Her tears falling onto the pillow.

            “We couldn’t find her, Ade! Then I heard her scream in pain. I-I don’t know how I knew she was hurt in my dream, but I did and I looked around again and h-he was dragging her! My baby! And she was screaming at him that she belonged to us, her mommies, but he just picked her up and started running. He got her, Ade!”

            The twins are between us, so I can’t hug her, but I lean into her hand as she wipes the tears from my cheeks and smoothes my hair behind my ear. “Listen Kenz. Listen to me. He won’t get them. He never will. I will be sure of it. Even if I have to have all our family members around us to keep an eye on the kids or hire security good enough to be in the secret service, I’ll do it.

            “Plus, speaking about the trial, I doubt he’ll even make the effort that the judge gave him, because it’ll look bad for him. Anger management does not bode well in hoity-toity New York society. Plus, I’m sure he’s a man-w***e and paying child support will not go over well with the ladies.”

            We both laugh, her jokes effectively making the situation lighter, and stare at each other in silence before I feel my eyes start getting heavy again. It’s been too long of a day and it’s only.. what time is it?

            “Ade, what time is it?” I whisper, my eyes unable to open.

            “It’s a little after three, babe. You sleep. Your family and I will have the kids. They’re safe and you’re safe. Always.” I feel her kiss my temple and start dozing off as the bedroom door closes.

Adrianna’s POV

            “So, we’ll all need to be on ‘mama alert’ for a while.” I overhear Mychal saying before walking into the kitchen where the Rivera’s are. “She’s already starting to go back to the place she was in the last time she saw him.” I keep quiet and just listen to the conversation going on, since I wasn’t there when Kenzie went through the court trial.

            “I don’t think she’ll let herself spiral as much as last time though. She has Conner and Anya, she doesn’t have her family breathing down her neck, and she has Ade again.” I smile at Naya’s kind words and I’m glad that we’re on good terms and see that both of us give to and need different things from Mackenzie; that we aren’t trying to replace the other person in her life.

            “But she’s going to be super clingy. Ade, you ready for that?” Mychal laughs and I smile in return.

            “I will be whatever she needs me to be right now and if she needs you guys, then I’ll be the first to call and give you guys some space. Mychal, you forget that I was the one that was there majority of the time when she got kicked out for the first time at sixteen. I’m not saying it to be rude or say I’m better than you for it. I’m just saying that sometimes you guys, and my family, forget that Mackenzie and I know so much more about each other than people think.

            “When we were teenagers, we didn’t have some stupid, preppy fling and you all know that. We talked about the future, our pasts, our dreams and fears. We talked about everything from the weather to marriage. From what we like on our sandwiches to traveling the world. I love the way she sees and interprets the world and everything around her.

            “That’s why I didn’t want to know what happened today from you guys, but from her. She interprets things differently than all of us. You all thought today went decent and she got mad for the way Kyle was acting, but that’s not why she was upset. She’s pissed that he was given the option to get better and see his kids. She’s terrified that he’s going to take them away from her. Her nightmare out there was about him kidnapping Anya.”

            “We will all be here for her and for the babies, but just like Adrianna said, Mackenzie will decide.” Mama Rivera, forever the peacemaker.

AGMJAGMJAGMJ

            “Kenzie, wake up.” I lay down on the bed next to her and kiss her cheeks and see her slight frown, so I know she’s just faking it now. “C’mon, choochie.” I laugh when I see her lips poke out, waiting for a kiss; her eyes still closed. I lean in a capture her lips in an innocent kiss that she quickly heats up by running her tongue across my bottom lip and I smile allowing her the entrance. “As much as I love to make out with you, it’s almost time for dinner, so why don’t you get in the shower, yes?”

            “No. I wanna make out with my super-hot girlfriend instead.” She bites down on my lip which she knows is a major turn on for me and any protest I had was now out of mind. I bring my hand up to her cheek as our tongues battle for dominance. I quickly give up the fight and allow the woman under me to take control. I feel her hands wrap around my waist and she gently squeezes my a*s. I follow her lead and move to straddle her legs, making sure not to break the connection between our lips.

            “Ba-babe.” I start to pull up, but she follows and pulls me back down by my shirt. Her legs wrap around the back of mine and I start to run my hands through her hair.

            “Ew! I’m not even in the room and I can hear your mouths going at it.” I quickly spring off Kenzie, attempting to fix my clothes as Naya turns the corner into the bedroom. “You know, next time you two wanna make out at least shut the door.” Her infamous smirk firmly plastered on her face.

            Mackenzie just laughs it off, but I can feel my cheeks heating up. “Maybe you could try announcing that you’re coming in.” I didn’t mean to snap, but it just happened.

            “Bubbles, what’s wrong?” I look away and attempt to stand up from the bed before Kenz grabs my arm to stop me. I look back at her and know that as soon as we lock eyes, she’ll know. “Don’t be embarrassed, Ade. It’s only Nay.”

            “I am though. No one in your family has ever walked in on us since that night.”

            “Wait, so you’re getting embarrassed over Naya walking in on us making out, but you laughed at me for getting embarrassed over your family hearing us have sex?” I can see that she’s getting upset over this, which isn’t my intention, but Naya quickly steps in.

            “Okay, you two need to chill. I’m sorry I just walked in unannounced, but technically I said something when I was still five feet down the hall. It’s not like you two were quiet. Anyway, it’s been an emotional day for everyone and all of us just need to eat and relax. Mom wants everyone at the table in less than an hour.

            Here’s what I suggest: Kenz, take a shower and relax, then the babies will probably be hungry. The nursery will be free of anybody and you can have some time by yourself with them. Ade, you’re helping us with dinner. Let’s go.”

            Before I could even say sorry to Mackenzie, Naya was pulling me out the door.

            Luckily, just before dinner is ready, I’m able to sneak away from Naya’s death glare long enough to grab Autumn and head into the nursery. I don’t interrupt the song that Kenzie is singing to the twins, I just step to the changing table and start changing Autumn. When both of us are finished, I snuggle Autumn and we move to sit in front of the rocking chair.

            “I’m sorry.” I try and sit Autumn in my lap, but she jumps up and stands next to the rocker; looking down at the twins.

            “It’s okay. I’m sorry, too. It’s been a long day.” My phone goes off and I move to quickly silence it as to not wake Conner and Anya.

            “Baby?”

            “Yea, honey?” I ask, looking up from the text message, but Mackenzie is looking at Autumn. “What’s up?”

            “It wasn’t me, Ade.”

            “Baby?” Autumn points at Anya and then looks at me, then up at Kenz. “Baby?” She repeats and points to Conner. A huge smile spreads across my face, because Autumn doesn’t talk very much yet and any new word is a huge feat for her.

            “Yes, Autumn. Those are Mackenzie’s babies. Can you say ‘Anya?’” I point to the little blonde in the pink onesie. Autumn stares blankly up at me, but giving me her biggest smile. “C’mon, Autumn. Say ‘Anya.’”

            “Ananana” I clap and both Kenz and I cheer my mini me on. At least she tried, that’s the most important thing.

            “Okay, Autumn, what about Conner. Can you say ‘Conner?’” I ask, pointing to the little boy in the green onesie.

            “Ner!” She exclaims and giggles when the two of us jump in surprise. We again clap and cheer her on. I pull her into me and give her a big hug and a kiss.

            “I’m so proud of you! I love you, baby girl.” The three of us look up when we hear a chime behind me. Naya brings her phone down, so I assume she was recording the moment.

            “I forgive you for sneaking off. Dinner’s ready.”

            “So, Mackenzie, how are you feeling? Are the medicines getting easier to handle?” I move to cut up Autumn’s dinner and glance across my daughter to look at Mackenzie, who is frowning at the question.

            “Do we really have to talk about that?” She rolls her eyes, which is unlike her, but I don’t want to jump in and question her right now. “Today has sucked, I really don’t want to talk about how unstable I am.”

            “Did you just roll your eyes?”

            “Yes, Mychal, it is a look most people can accomplish.” She starts stabbing into her food and I honestly don’t know what happened in the last ten minutes since we left the nursery, because she was fine then.

            “Baby, can you come into the kitchen with me?” I don’t wait for her to answer. I just grab her hand and guide her into the next room, sliding the pocket door shut behind us. “What’s wrong?” I give her a hug and I’m relieved when she relaxes into me, her arms snaking around my waist.

            “It’s the stupid medicine. Since they changes the dosages around the other day, it makes me all agitated sometimes and I really don’t like it. I want to be off of it. I think I’m more depressed and upset when I’m on it, than when I skip taking it.”

            “Kenz!” I pull back a little to look into her eyes. “When did you not take it?”

            “Today was the first day in the last three days that I took it.” She looks down.

            “You skipped the last two days? Why?”

            “I’m tired of being a zombie, Ade. I’m tired of being annoyed all the time and feeling wrong in my own skin. I’m still taking my inhaler if I get anxious, but I just don’t like that other stuff.”

            “Tomorrow I’m booking you another appointment and I’ll go with you. If you want to get off of them, we’ll get you off, but I don’t want you spiraling again. If I even think that you are, we’re going back and you’re getting it renewed.”

            “Okay.” She nods her head in agreement and I lean down to connect our lips in a chaste kiss before taking her hand and walking back out into the dining room.

            “So, are you two excited to be on the show next season?” Naya immediately changing the subject as the two of us sit back down.

            “I’m not guaranteed on the show yet. I still have to do a screen test.”

            “Yea, but Ryan basically said you’re on, so.. you excited?”

            “I am!” Mackenzie exclaims and the table all smiles and laughs. “What? I’m always on set anyway. Might as well get paid.” She turns to me and winks and my smile doubles.

            “I’m excited too. It’ll be a lot different than anything I’ve done before. I’ve never been on a real set or anything before, so it’ll be interesting. I am excited though and it’s something we get to do together.” I squeeze Kenzie’s left hand in my right, over Autumn’s lap, and she leans over to kiss my cheek. Autumn just laughs and claps at the sentiment.

            “Well, we all are proud of you girls and just want you both to know that we are always available to babysit. That goes for Autumn as well, Adrianna, you know we already consider her one of our own. Grandma and Grandpa Rivera.” George beams at me and starts waving at Autumn from down the table, the little brunette smiling and waving back with a handful of mash potatoes.

            “Thank you. All of you, really. I know you all didn’t have to welcome me back into your lives when Mackenzie and I started even talking again, but I appreciate everything you all have done for me and Mackenzie and Autumn and Conner and Anya. You all are her family and it means the world to me that you accept me and support us in everything we do.”

            “You’ve always been part of the family, Adrianna. Any girlfriend, or I guess I can’t say boyfriend, of my children has a place in our hearts. That means you, Heather, and Lea are all our family as well. Families support, love, and cherish one another.”

            “Well, again, just thank you.”

AGMJAGMJAGMJ

            “Bye! We love you guys!” Naya yells back to Kenz and I as everyone loads into their cars to head home.

            “We love you too! Drive safe!” Mackenzie yells back before leaning into my side, her head resting on my shoulder. She yawns, but I know she won’t move until the driveway is cleared of all the familiar cars. I turn my head towards the clock on the wall, it’s going on eleven and Autumn has her one year checkup in the morning.

            “Choochie.” I turn to kiss the side of her head and she leans into the graze. “Autumn has her one year checkup in the morning. I kept pushing it off, because of everything, so we should get going.”

            “No, baby, please stay.” Her arms wrapped tightly around my waist. “I don’t want to be alone tonight. Plus, Autumn’s already asleep in the nursery. It would be silly to wake her up just to go home and have her sleep again. Please. Just stay.”

            She starts placing light kisses along my jawline towards my mouth. “Okay, we’ll stay.”

            “Yay!” She quickly slams are lips together in a hard kiss that ends with a smack when she pulls away just as fast. “Thank you.”

            “You’re welcome. Why don’t you go put more medicine on your hands and get ready and I’ll lock up and turn the lights out.”

            “Okay.”

            Once we’re both in bed, we end up talking about everything and nothing for close to another hour before Mackenzie finally relaxes enough to start falling asleep. I know she’s nervous to have another nightmare, but I keep assuring her that I’ll be right here every time she wakes up. No one is going to hurt her or the babies.

            With one final goodnight kiss, Kenz closes her eyes and curls into my chest. I wrap my arm around her to entice her to roll to the other side, which she slowly does, and I pull her back into me. Kissing her hair, I whisper, “Buenas noches y dulces sueños, mi amor.”

Author's Note

Honestly, I'm in such a slump with this story and I haven't been able to write in it for about two years, but it's a goal of mine to finish, because it's the first thing I've ever written. Any constructive reviews could help or anything that would be cool to write about in future chapters. Thanks!