Inevitable Things

The Infinity Clockworks ~ Lunar Fantasia ~

第一単： 月の都市
Arc 1: The Lunar City

The game Seine was participating starts early in the morning. Seine, Rokka, Naru and Kaname woke up really early so that they could prepare Seine to the game she was participating in which is a Cooking Contest. Seine chose the cooking contest because she said that she really likes cooking and was taught by a great cook before she came to the RPG World.

The contest is going to be held inside the south colloseum. 
「I'm sorry Seine but I have to go to my game」Naru hugged Seine tightly. 
「It's okay, I feel nervous when someone I know watch me」Seine laughed as she pushed away Naru away from her. 
「If that's the case, we'll leave you alone」Kaname pat Seine's back as she walked inside the colosseum.

「I have to go to my game too」Naru sticked out her tongue and closed her left eye in attempt to look cute, 
「What game are you participating?」Kaname ignored Naru's sad attempt to look cute and asked her about the game she was participating. 
「It's a simple painting contest. Paint or draw something amazing in just two hours. Anyway, I need to go now」Naru walked backwards so that she could still wave her hand at Kaname and Rokka. 
「I will be at the East colosseum!」Naru's figure started to get smaller and smaller to the point her figure was lost in the sea of people.

「Kaname-sama you can go wherever you want, I have some groceries to buy」Rokka walked off by herself and Kaname decided to follow her. 
「I'll help you, Rokka」Kaname walked beside Rokka. 
「Thank You, Kaname-sama」Rokka didn't look at Kaname when she responded to him, she seemed to be avoiding looking at Kaname. Kaname seemed aware of Rokka's action and seemed that he knew the reason why. 

Kaname and Rokka walked beside each other as they browse the shopping center of Arceudia without talking. Suddenly, a pillar of purple light emerge from the horizon which caught Kaname's attention, 
「Hey, Rokka!」Kaname poked Rokka's hip to get her attention, 
「What is it Kaname-sama?」Rokka turned arounf to face Kaname, 
「Can I go there?」An arrogant smile spread on Kaname's face.
「No, we are shopping for the Celebration of the birthday of the 15th Moon」Rokka was planning on making food for everyone as they enjoy looking at the moon in their room. 
「Oh, we have things to do....haa...I thought that I saw a really strong enemy....It's a bummer but let's go now, Rokka」Kaname resumed walking.

While the two were walking, Kaname saw an alley where no one comes. 
「Rokka, there seemed to be a shortcut there」Kaname pointed at the dark alley he found. Rokka instinctively believed Kaname's words and entered the dark alley. When they both entered the dark alley, Kaname stopped. 
「Is it because of those eyes?」Kaname talked to Rokka, 
「What are you talking about, Kaname-sama?」Rokka still avoiding eye contact with Kaname, 
「Tell me what you see. Be honest as you could possibly be」Kaname's eyes  looked sharp and scary. 
「I see you, Kaname-sama. I can't see anything wrong」Rokka was trembling and sweat started to flow down her forehead, 
「I told you to be honest, I didn't tell you to do the opposite」Kaname walked towards Rokka. Rokka was so scared that she couldn't even move, 
「・・・・・・」Rokka was speechless. Kaname grabbed Rokka's neck and gripped it tightly. Kaname immediately let go of Rokka's neck. Rokka dropped the groceries they bought as she couched and struggled to catch her breath. 
「I see a monster covered with darkness.」Rokka finally answered Kaname's question. 
「I see....The world may be different but the people are the same...huh. I need to go to the game I am participating in.」Kaname walked out of the dark alley, leaving Rokka who was on four legs. 
「I did the same thing again......」Rokka punched the concrete ground with her left fist. Suddenly, tears started to flow out from her eyes, 
「I am a failure as a friend.....」

To be continued

Reviews

[Markius]

hmm, I find your writing style to be interesting, don't believe I have ever seen someone use this format so congrats for the creativity. The story thus far is interesting and I look forward to reading more.

However if there is one concern I have with this it is the brevity of the chapters. this one for example is only 728 words, if you wish this to become a novel it will need to have more than that per chapter, from what I have be able to research about an average chapter should be over 2000 words with the longer ones reaching 7000 or 8000.

This is important because the flow of a book will dictate who reads it and how long they read it, to be considered a novel it needs at least 50,000 words and even then that is on the low side.

don't take this the wrong way, I am very much enjoying the story and the writing style, and that is why I am telling you this, publishers will not look at a book with under 50,000 words, and if you keep the chapters at this length you will have roughly 50 or so chapters to reach that, which will be fine if that is what you want in the novel, but I worry the flow of the story might get thrown off if each chapter is so small.

keep up the good work I will be watching for more writing from you!

[kclyaine]

I don't think his planning to make it into a novel. Probably novella or novellete when it comes to word count. But his works are based on Light Novels or LNs. If you never heard of it before, its japanese for novellas and really quite cheap. His writings might be acceptable for word limits since its 100+ pages. But I still think his writings are quite short too and choppy, probably because I'm too used reading novels

[Markius]

a light novel is actually no smaller than an average novel spice and wolf for example is 70,000 or so words per novel over 20,000 words over the needed wordcount its more about how it is published and printed(smaller size and print)

[kclyaine]

Are you an editor? You're really knowledgeable about the subject in hand. I don't even expect people to even know the maximum wordcount. So did you read the translated version?

[Markius]

I am writing a novel my self and have put months of research into things like this, and my friends wife is an editor, as for light novels, I originally started thinking it was smaller than an average novel and thinking "I should do that it will be easier" then I actually looked into them and found that they are no more light than an avg. novel hehe.

you should check out my book im working on(there are typos sorry I have to go back and fix them hehe)
and yes I have read the translated version of spice and wolf, I own every volume hehe

[❀Subaru_Nyaa!❀]

I would like to say that I know it is short but it states up there that is in Arc (Number) for me that is how I treat it as a chapter. If I make every portion really long, it will put off many people from reading it and make me disorganize. The first part of this book is "The Sun God Arrives", normally this book and The Sun God arrives is a one big thing but I had to cut since like I said will get me to lose the organized files I have been keeping the whole time.

If this will be printed, I might consider making it longer since I do want to insert more things in the plot but if I did that, the amount of this book alone will be over a hundred Arcs which is considerably long and I am sure that it won't attract any readers since most of the people here are going to read a long thing. Don't get me wrong, I do want to write a really long one but the book will be like detective conan; It takes 200+ episodes to progress the story or reading a series of books that only have meaningless scenes and takes 3 volumes to get to the full climax.

Currently, I don't care about the length and all I care is to make myself happy when I make a story and if that makes people happy or enjoy reading my works, it makes me more happy.

[Markius]

well then by all means keep up the good work, it is after all your work(and I do find it interesting) I will keep an eye on this!

[kclyaine]

I actually read your work. There so many typos, grammar mistakes, and misplaced terms, so I know that you weren't an editor before you commented. If you know an editor, you should ask for her help. Anyway, your work is great. I'm also like medievel type writer so it captivated me. I hope your novel got publish.

And Dude, Detective Conan is on 700+ eps in season 24. And for the manga is 900+. The main story is really slow moving but I think we're nearly at the end. Probably the author wants it to be finished at 1000 just like in Naruto that at 700. But I still wonder how many years does it still need to finish the anime and how many years would conan will still be 6 or 8 just like in pokemon but younger than ash

[Markius]

Ah thank you, and yes these are the roughs I posted, and yes those are some of my weakest points, I have a friend going through them as we speak, and hopefully after that I can get Jean(shes my best friends wife and an editor) to look over it, apparently she only charges $2 per page so that's not to bad if you ask me...

[kclyaine]

Though if I were you, I would ask someone to do it for free or 75 cents per page cause $2 is too much especially if you haven't published an actual novel

[kclyaine]

You do know there's about 300-500 pages for novels and you have to pay $2 for each page. Its not a good deal.