Casting

                                                                             Casting

     I have heard that the number of jobs, as a movie extra, that are provided by Central Casting, ranges from 75 to 95%.  A lot of casting companies, come and go, but I think  Central is still around. Last I heard, so was Rainbow Casting, but they changed their name. I hope Bill Dance, is still around. Dixie Webster too. A lot easier to get noticed, by them, than it is Central Casting.  I remember when I first signed up with Dixie Webster. They had a recording, at their phone number, that said, “We will not give you directions, to our office. If you are not smart enough to find your way here, then we do not want you working for us.” My kind of company. There were many other companies, but these are the ones, that gave me, the most work, and the best jobs. 

     Nowadays, I here a lot of the bookings are done online. I doubt I will work on set again. It’s possible, but I doubt it. Hollywood is, as always, obsessed with youth. Like older people do not watch TV, or go to movies. I would like 5 cents, for every time I called casting, and heard,” We are looking for people, 18 to look younger.” The people in my age group called it, “18 to look dumber.” 

     The movie industry is one of the few, if not the only industry, still allowed to discriminate, against people, depending on what they are filming. You won’t see many black people, on a set, where  they are filming a KKK rally. I once worked on a set, as a KKK member. We were going to hang a black man, just for being black. All the young pretty girls, in the film, rallied to his rescue, because he was already hung. In case you are wondering, they do use extras in porn movies. 

     I discovered that you must somehow, get noticed, by casting. Until then, you will spend many hours, on the phone. Today may be different, but in 1994, it was on the phone. Calling, and calling, and calling, trying to book a job. If you get noticed, casting calls you. If not, you call casting. Extras do many things, to get noticed. I just did my job. My job was to go unnoticed. Be invisible. I like to think I was pretty good at it. 75% of it, was just knowing when to keep your mouth shut. 20% is following directions. The last 5% is, MIND YOUR MANNERS! Not enough people do this, so extras get a bad reputation. 

     When I arrived at my very first movie set, I saw gunfire, explosions, and bodies flying through the air. I heard a crew member tell catering he was on a low cholesterol diet, and could he have a bacon, egg, and cheese burrito, with extra bacon. I knew then, that I could do this. Be invisible? I had been doing that, most of my life. This would be easy. I cared nothing for show business. This was a job. Nothing more. I work for you. You pay me. Pretty simple. Unless the pay is not right. Then we have a problem. If you are going to work me, off the clock, you need my permission. I expect this from any employer. This only happened to me, 3 or 4 times, but casting always took care of it, and nobody, I worked for, ever got away with not paying me for my time. As long as you pay me, you get to make the rules. Because you make the rules, I must insist, you follow them. If you do not, I might not. I can be very expensive. I try to give as I get. If I work for you, for free, it is because I like you. Not because I want something. I once had an employer, my wife politely referred to as “The Mosquito.” “Why?” you may ask. “Because he is annoying, he is a bloodsucker, and sooner, or later, everyone he comes into contact with, wants him dead.” She has a wonderful way, of describing things.  

     So off to Central Casting, I go. I listened to a speech, paid a fee, and got my picture taken. Then I was sent home with copies of the rules, and phone numbers to call, to get work. The first number was a “men’s, non-union line.” This was my category. It was a recorded message, containing all the work available, in my category. If I felt I was qualified to do any of the work,  the recording included another number, to call the casting director. This number is almost always busy. We thanked God, every day , for the automatic redial. Casting is very particular about what they want. Hence, one of my favorite casting jokes.

     An Elephant calls casting. Ring-ring, ring-ring. “Casting, please hold.” Click. Waiting, waiting. “Casting, what’s your social?” Elephant gives social security number. “Do you have gray, wrinkled skin?” “Yes.” “Big floppy ears?” “Yes.” ” A trunk?” “Yes.” “Tusks?” “Yes.” “Legs, as thick as trees?” “Yes” “Do you weigh over 5000 pounds?” “Yes.” “I’m sorry, we can’t use you.” “Why not?” “We are looking for Indian Elephants, and you are an African Elephant. Sorry. Try again later.” Click.

     When I say particular, I mean particular. I once heard a recording, seeking men with ugly feet, who were willing to let production, glue hair onto them, for that Neanderthal look. When I worked on “War of the Worlds,” Spielberg, and company, sprayed us with designer mud. Real mud is uncool. Hollywood mud is special. It would not surprise me to find out, this mud was made by Max Factor. It even smelled good. 

     Far to many people were trying to get noticed, by casting, for me to compete, so I decided to get noticed by production. Production only wants 5 things. Suit up, show up, shut up, grow up, and do your job. It makes their job easier. Your job is, being cooperative, taking direction, making a fool of yourself, wearing the correct wardrobe, hitting your mark, working long hours, in sometimes ruthless conditions, like high wind, in the high desert, at night. You will also be despised, and referred to, as a “prop that eats.” If you can do all these things, and still remain invisible, perhaps production will notice you. This happened to me, on more than one occasion. 

     Casting was looking for someone to portray a small town farmer, in a bar. I assured them, I could do it, and they booked me. I arrived in bib-overalls, tan work boots, a long sleeved, plaid flannel shirt, with the sleeves rolled up, and a baseball cap, with scrambled eggs, on the brim. For a “splash of color,” I wore a bright red  Osh-Kosh bandana/handkerchief, hanging out of my back pocket. They placed me right on the corner, of the bar, which was L-shaped. During shooting, a woman came up to me, and said, “You look really  good.” “Thanks,” I replied, “I wasn’t sure about the handkerchief.” “Are these our clothes?” she inquired. “No, I brought all this stuff, from home,” I said. She smiled at me, “Great job,” and walked away. Shortly thereafter, I was informed, by casting, that I would be a regular extra, on this show. So I got noticed by production, and they asked casting to book me, and that got me noticed, by casting. The show was called, “Picket Fences.” I worked on it until it got cancelled. Don’t get me wrong. I do not mean to imply that I am perfect, or special. I have done many things, on set, that I probably, should not have. Starting with taking pictures.