TNP 09 "Fitting In"

TNP 09 "Fitting In"

A Chapter by dw817

My time and life in working for the government during the Savings & Loan Crisis of 1990 with a beautiful woman who took care of absolutely everything for me in my employ. And I mean EVERYTHING.




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My time in working for the government during the Savings & Loan Crisis of 1990 with a beautiful
woman who took care of absolutely everything for me in my employ. And I mean EVERYTHING.

© July 2013 Written by David Wicker
Please do not reprint without permission

* * *

This chapter is Rated: TEEN

If what I thought happened earlier was a calamity, it certainly didn't appear so now. I returned to my cubicle and just heard busy typing around me.

I looked a few aisles over to see if Barbara was working and she was looking at something in her copy holder and typing it out. I caught her eye to see if everything was OK and apparently it wasn't as she scowled when she saw me.

I was going to look away but then she looked like she was thinking of something which gave me a moment of concern. Then she sat up in her chair and stared down at the table where her keyboard was for a moment as if making a decision on something.

Suddenly she got up with a look of determination on her face and started walking towards me !

I quickly turned my head and acted like I was doing something else where I couldn't see her. She made a bee-line to my cubicle and I saw a shadow fall over my copy-holder.

I looked behind for a moment and suddenly felt her arm against my chest. I didn't know if she was being super-friendly in a nice hug or something but I didn't have long to figure it out when she suddenly reached around and squeezed my neck painfully, her arm wrapped around me, choking me.

Then she both growled and whispered in my ear, "You put me through a lot of embarrassment earlier mister, so you're going to kiss my a*s in the restroom, right now ! Let's go honeypie !"

Naturally my eyes got really fearful with that horrific threat, and it was hard to breathe additionally with her choke-hold as she tried to yank me out of my chair.

so I tightened my legs around my black office rolling chair and focused one hand on my typing, while trying, unsuccessfully, with my other hand to pull her arm off my neck as she tightened it.

She was actually pretty muscular and when I think about it, she reminds me a lot of Rose today and my chair easily started rolling out of my cubicle with her with me in it. She stopped for a moment seeing this wasn't going to work as I had gripped my legs around the bottom of the chair.

Someone finally walked by, but they were clearly unaware of my predicament as they only spoke in an imperious voice to her, "Barbara. You are away from your desk. You can socialize later. Return to your workstation."

Barbara bit her lip and took the choke hold off of me and looked at me as I coughed. She really was determined to choke me good ! I couldn't look at her face at all I was so scared of her right now.

I hurriedly zipped my chair back in by scooting back in on my toes and imagined a big stone portal closing behind me, blocking her off. I prayed one appeared. I guess I was hallucinating or something because it felt like the air had changed and I was put into a vacuum, my ears definitely changed pitch.

Obviously there wasn't a barrier as much as I wished there was.

She easily walked back in my cubicle and leaned forward on my chair from behind me and I saw her reflection like an evil ghost on my curved computer screen. She was really quite pretty, like everyone else on this floor, but then added quietly, not really whispering.

"You keep that to yourself if you like breathing." And then she started to walk away like we were done but d****t I made a funny sound, I couldn't help it ! It was a kind of whimper because I was really scared right then and couldn't hold it inside any longer.

She apparently liked the sound of that so she turned back around and sweetly caressed the back of my neck as I trembled to the touch of her sharp fingernails there and she added back in a whisper in my ear.

"Did I scare you ? Poor baby. Well you just knock on my cubicle whenever you're ready because this sweet offer will ALWAYS be good for you as long as you are working on my floor, you f*****g pansy !'

And then she bit my ear painfully and headed out with a bit of mean laughter.

* * *

And I found myself coughing and scratching my head on why women had to be so mean, and trying not to cry and my chest hurt because I was doing my absolute level best not to whimper any more and I felt like I was going to pass out from tension by not doing so.

Then my left-eye began to twitch. It's this funny thing I get whenever I'm stressed now. The muscles actually tug on it blurring my vision. I even have it today, and it all started originally from Barbara and her, well, anger towards me I guess.

And no, I didn't tell Nancy about Barbara or her hateful offer in the women's bathroom because she REALLY scared the hell out of me, and yes, I liked breathing. And I avoided Barbara. If I saw her in the hall, I ducked down another.

She learned rather quickly I was definitely avoiding her and she never actively sought me out after that, as she threatened, but she still liked to give me menacing smiles if we walked by each other in the hallway or if I met her eyes on the floor.

Fortunately, she didn't visit me of her own accord again and despite this, I felt guilty, like I did need to apologize with her, but just a handshake or something friendlier. But I doubt she would have ever accepted that.

So since then I never questioned or tried to figure out what was happening with that conversation they had after that or why she didn't get in trouble like she should've for lying to me since I obviously heard laughter in there. But did she really have to do or say something embarrassing to make it all right again ?

And now my brain is working, it does sometimes, I have to wonder now if power or authority isn't something you have or are licensed with it as it is something other people believe you have so you do as you're told and there's no problem then.

In any case, the rest of the day passed quietly. Nancy did indeed call me in after work to talk about the evils of spying on other employees and I did apologize for that, which seemed to soften her mood.

Back home I called up Dad and said that the clothes I wore, the Broadcloth pants were good so we bought several more pair and went out for a late dinner of pizza at Pizza Hut.

When I returned home I looked a bit at Doomsday and the users who accessed it and finally crashed in bed with strange dreams, pertaining to my employ at BBI and a fond affection for Nancy, especially because she treated me so well at work by letting me know what I was doing both wrong and right there.

The next day, I got to work and met Nancy, as I was supposed to, before I began work at 9am. She went over my suggestion cards as she recommended that I write up at least one a day.

But I had to wonder why because then she sat down with me to explain why each of them wouldn't work but isn't it nice I spent the time to try and help the company ?

I wondered a bit about that. Back at work there was a mandatory meeting at 11am to discuss skirt lengths, and I served some coffee to everyone else on a tray I was given. But I had absolutely no idea why I had to attend since I didn't even wear a skirt myself.

After several charts were drawn and seen on a presentation board explaining skirt fabric lengths and a good hour had passed in the meeting, from mind-numbing boredom. I was getting hungry for lunch, so I I finally raised my hand with coffee tray in hand and was recognized to speak.

I told them, quite simply, I don't think I need to be in this meeting because I don't wear skirts myself.

I thought surely the logic in that would dismiss me from the meeting so I could go to lunch, but it didn't.

Instead, Nancy asked me to stand up straight, so I set down the coffee tray and stood erect. Then she asked me to turn around, so I did a 360 twirling in place. Twice, as she requested.

Then she said matter-of-fact, "You see what David is wearing, is perfectly within regulations."

There was some chuckles and laughter so then I queeped out that obviously I'm not wearing a skirt as this was what apparently the meeting was about so why am I here ?

But then Trudy got up to stand beside me and hugged my middle and said, "Oh, but that can change, can't it guys ? I mean, isn't David one of the girls now, officially ? I vote that he wear a regulation skirt just like the rest of us ! And a cute one at that to reflect his personality !" and she clicked her tongue in approval.

There was more amusement from the group and a few half-hearted whistles and several hands went up to carry that motion, so I finally sat down red-faced, not wanting to stand any longer. Trudy patted me on the back but I was really feeling sore now with what she said.

"You were kidding, weren't you ?" I asked her with all sincerity and felt terrible and sour inside.

She paused a moment, swallowing her leer but finally said, "Yes, of course I'm teasing you, David !" she said and rubbed her hand in my head to show that I was a good sport. I felt a bit better.

Unfortunately, a few minutes later she leaned over and not-quite-so-much whispered where others could still hear her, "But David, you REALLY would look great in a skirt, and I'm certain I could swing things here so you could wear one here."

I greeted her with a shocked look but she just narrowed her eyes at me wickedly and continued, "Say, let's get together after work. I know this great clothing store and I'll even let you pick out one or two skirts for yourself, my treat ! It'll be fun !"

I coughed suddenly feeling my tongue get swallowed in panic at what she said. When I finally regained my composure I greeted her with as dirty a look as I could but she returned it with an innocent smile showing all her pretty white teeth. God, she was serious !

* * *

Despite the fact the company would likely let me wear a skirt, I doubted my Dad ever let me go to work that way irregardless of the team's apparent acceptance of it.

After that little embarrassing incident, I NEVER raised my hand to speak up during any future meetings with the knowledge I would be ridiculed for it, and fortunately, I was never called on anything because of my timidity.

The horrible meeting lasted 2-hours and from what I could gather they were wanting to hike up their skirts I believe it was 3/4 of an inch and they all had to sign special forms, double, to permit it. What a terrible waste of government time I thought to myself !

I was glad to get back to my cubicle and even happier to go to lunch even if an hour late. The rest of that work day passed without incident although I did notice Barbara giving me wistful looks occasionally from her own cubicle.

Countered with an occasional passionate pursing of her lips in a mock kiss to remind me of her 'friendly' deal, but I fully remembered what she said earlier so I never took her up on her 'gracious' offer.

When I got home that evening, I let Rose know, officially, that I had a job for the government but tried to keep most of it to myself as Nancy warned me that most of the training methods they used there were classified. And I couldn't lie to save my life.

Nancy would know immediately if I talked to ANYONE about the instructions and tutorials I received there from her.

I really couldn't see how they were top-secret, but I also didn't want get in trouble so I just told Rose that I did data entry and that I had Nancy, a supervisor for myself.

Rose said that's fine and I better do a good job this time, because this likely would be the very last chance I would get before I would have to start receiving unemployment benefits from the brief times I was employed by other bosses earlier, which sucked - in more ways than one.

The next morning I arrived at work and there and I immediately went to see Nancy as she always wanted me to do before I started work that day, and apparently there was something ELSE wrong now.

I sat in the chair in her office and, like before, several women from the other cubicles all piled in and started talking with each other. Apparently some forms were filled out incorrectly and all the blame was somehow getting shifted to me, I guess because it was an error they were unfamiliar with - that and the fact I was the new worker.

It was terrible. I was really afraid I was going to lose my job AGAIN here and at this point I had been with the company a month or so and it wasn't someone misdirecting where I should put the forms, but actual errors in the forms themselves. I knew I couldn't have done that though as I strive for accuracy before speed !

What I didn't understand is as I sat and listened, they all referred to me as if I weren't there. Things like, well, it's obviously David's fault, who's going to tell him he's fired, you get along better with him, you tell him. Stuff like that. And I was sitting right there !

But then Trudy spoke up, defending me, just like once again, "David knows too little about the company to make these kinds of errors. I say he's too incompetent to do this and it must be someone else's fault." and she turned to smile at me.

I was never so glad to be in the position I was then ! Temporary Employee - Data Entry Specialist, and nothing higher or more prominent. And in time =IF= I was ever was offered a promotion I would most definitely turn it down as I wouldn't want that kind of responsibility or possible blame to fall on me when there were problems with things.

I've always been that way and always turned down promotions, including when I worked for McDonald's for over a year and was offered many times management position but I never wanted it for the same reasons, too much responsibility.

Nancy sighed as I was getting so familiar with and said and pinched her eyebrows in sign of on obvious headache while saying, "David. Go on break till we sort this out."

I wasn't about to talk back to her this time so I just nodded, excused myself, and left to the cafeteria to get a soda and a snack. I didn't dare return to my desk until called.

It was about an hour later Nancy came to see me in the break room and showed me some of the forms that she was having problems with.

She asked if I had worked on these. I said I didn't know. Did I recognize them. I said I wasn't sure. Have I ever seen them before. I said I couldn't say. She said do you see anything wrong with this form. I said I can't see anything, but I could be wrong.

She looked at me. She wasn't mad. She just knew I wanted to maintain 100% neutrality towards this problem they were having so no blame would fall on me.

She finally smiled and said that I was exhibiting very good 'company policy' profile, by not getting involved in others' affairs and once I finished break, return back to my cubicle and she'll have some things for me to type.

I smiled. I was definitely starting to feel more at home here. Uninvolvement was apparently a credit to this company and for me not to really understand what work I was doing was apparently the right answer for my position.

* * *

I thought about it and I did talk to Dad about it later that evening when he treated me out to eat again the next week.

He was saying there probably were ways to do this job illegally where you could steal money from the company by writing out the forms a particular way - but because I did only what I was told, even if I didn't understand it, that made me a model employee there.

I understood this logic, and I liked. The next day I did see Nancy before lunchtime to use the restroom and told her that I would like to have Jeanette as my 'bathroom escort' from now on.

She raised her eyebrows at this but nodded and said she would fill out the paperwork to that effect, but that I would still need to see her to use the facilities, but that she would choose her each time I did, if that's what I really wanted.

Things were done by the book ! Maybe no-one could read the book or even understood what language it was in, who wrote it, or how it even got published, but things were DONE BY THE BOOK, and that was all there was to it, and if I followed this strange sense of logic, I could definitely be ensured that I never got fired from this job !

* * *

The suggestions I made each day were about how to improve certain forms of data-entry and while none were ever accepted as being 'correct,' Nancy did take the time to explain to me why, and in some cases said, "Well David, YOU might be able to do this, but NO-ONE else can, so we can't adopt this policy globally."

That was fine. I've always stood out in a crowd though not necessarily in a positive manner most of my life and I was glad she let me use my own short-cut techniques with the data-entry program they used to improve accuracy and speed.

Generally through a series of macro generators I developed for the program once I understood how it worked. I think it was called Word Perfect.

When I went home, I talked to Dad on the phone and he was glad that I didn't get involved in the problems they were having. He told me, the less I get involved in what the company is actually doing, the better off I will be. And that most governments worked this way.

It was the sneaky people, who knew the system and tried to change the numbers so they could steal from the company, these were the people that would not only get fired but imprisoned and Dad was proud of me for not even attempting to understand or even want to know, where all the money went in the forms I worked on.

He explained it well too. He said that =IF= someone was stealing money from the company and I was working for them, they couldn't get mad with me either because I would never recognize their theft additionally.

Further if that same person got caught, I would also be in the clear because I had such little knowledge of the proceedings involving the money at all, so I would be guaranteed a long and stable job in my ignorance.

Obviously to my knowledge Nancy wasn't stealing any money from the company. I couldn't say the same about Barbara, but I avoided her and the subtle reminders of her offer she hinted at each day to me, and that was enough.

The following day was a Saturday which I had off and I still had my Cable TV at the time with CNN and Cartoon Network so so I watched some cartoons. Back then they didn't have commercials and I was on a 3-month trial period for free to see if I liked it. I told them I would keep it as long as there would be no commercials.

Obviously today there are commercials all over Cable TV today so when I saw them starting to appear is when I decided not to continue it and instead checked out VHSes from Skagg's Albertson's.

Now, one thing I liked working for Nancy is if I did something right, she usually had a treat for me, usually picked out from the 25c gumball machine at a grocery store not far from BBI. I never did mind and always thought each gift she gave me was better than the last.

From a little plastic football helmet, to a keychain fob and bunchees of other things, usually costing no more than a quarter.

I never got any more Tootsie Rolls fortunately, and I was glad for that. I sometimes wondered what that thing was she had me eat - and when I think I had the right answer - I got sick thinking about it.

There was a BBI party I remember one time complete with cupcakes where prizes were given out to top employees. Unfortunately all the prizes were girlie things like eyeliner, lipstick, and stick-on-earrings for little girls, stuff like that.

I remember we were having cake and celebrating something or other and there was a drawing for a prize and I received this really PINK lipstick in a beautiful gift box. Obviously the women teased me to try it on but I didn't, and I found a neat way out of my embarrassment about it.

I gave it to Trudy. Who in turn took the cap off and hummed sweetly to me as she spread it on her lips, the other girls watched and giggled.

Then she took the side of the container and gave it a really big pink sticky pink kiss on it, and handed the container back to me with the kiss and said I should keep it with me at all times, as a good luck charm.

Which the other girls hooted in approval - I can honestly say I'm not sure where it is now in my boxes of clutter today. While I never told Rose about all the crazy girls I worked with at BBI, I'm certain if she found my lipstick gift one time, instead of asking me about where it came from, she would take it for herself and say I bought it for her earlier.

* * *

Because I knew that was how Rose operated, she liked makeup and stuff, even if it was found. It was the only girlie gift I accepted as Nancy had some nice Cracker-Jack prizes for me when she knew I was going to receive acknowledgement for my work there.

I remember buying some 99c prizes for when I worked for Star Telegram (a job I had later when I was finally released from BBI) and that was fun too as my manager would hand out the prize on who made the best sales for that day, but that's a different story.

In the days that followed at BBI, sometimes we were called into a meeting and it was simple stuff like giving out recognition to employees who didn't 'mess things up' and I remember being called on for that.

I remember getting recognized and actually appreciated quite often for quite often doing nothing. I would be invited, sit at the head of the table and someone would begin and say, "I just want to open up the meeting with this order of business and say what a great job David is doing here by not MESSING ANYTHING UP !"

And they would all stand up and clap and cheer and then insist I stand up and make a speech about how I did it. And of course I was always really nervous at speeches.

Trudy would come up and put her arm around me for support and told me, "It's okay David. Just tell them how you didn't mess things up cause everyone really does want to know HOW you did that."

And I told them ! And while I think it's silly now, back then I was =SO= proud of myself when I said it !

I said, "I watch people's footsteps and try hard not to get in their way. If someone wants me to type something I do it and then bring it back to Nancy and is there anything else I can do for her. And I always say 'yes ma'am' and 'please' and 'thank you' and never speak unless spoken to."

They liked when I said that and I often got little medals and trinkets that way, from the same grocery store nearby, cause I recognized a few of them when I put my own quarters in to try and get something neat. And I received another for giving a crazy speech such as this.

Despite all this, it made me feel wanted in a company, I was always always complimented on giving good advice afterwards and that was really important to me, to fit in a company because I never really felt like I did.

But it was odd. It was almost always women I worked around in all the jobs I've had which required paperwork because typing apparently was a stereotypical job reserved for women, and they were almost always very kind to me and of course in this job it was entirely women.

Whenever I worked around men they were HATEFUL to me, like I was someone's lost kid, or I was part of an elaborate prank by another worker.

I remember working at a restaurant and it was a slow day and for some reason all the late-shift employees, all guys about my age, 18, piled in the restroom when I was using one of the urinals and then proceeded to harass me there saying I couldn't pee straight.

And then they'd joke and say I needed to take classes for it, so show up at night here and they'll give me free instruction.

And of course, I never did, because I wasn't THAT gullible because that happened one other time and I DID show up at night because they made me feel so bad about my bathroom etiquette - and - well - it wasn't good what happened and I know I got swirled in the restaurant's toilet for what seemed like an hour as everyone crowded around me laughing about it.

So I was usually transferred to another location or had to quit the job or I got suicidal for what they did to me in there and stuff.

I tell you now, you may think it's fun to tease people in the bathroom, but if you continuously do it, you deny them a chance to grow up, to find their own identity, and that can make them very depressed and suicidal and have mental and social problems later that can NEVER be cured, so please don't do it !

Anyways, aside from this and it did remind me, I do remember being called in Nancy's office several times for the 3-months I worked there and sitting in that chair and she just seemed to ignore me even though she called specifically for me.

And I waited, and she smiled at me, and either worked on papers or busily shaped her fingernails with a file she had, and I always seemed to get a little nervous like I was forgotten. And finally I said, "Ma'am ?" in my nice quiet voice.

And then she asked, "David ! Is there a problem ? Do you need to go to the little boy's room ?"

And I said, "No ma'am, just that maybe I needed to get back to work - maybe ?"

And she said got very firm in her voice and said, "Very well David, but you better mind what I tell you or you'll get in trouble mister !"

And I said, "Yes ma'am."

And she said, "Okay, run along now. Scoot !" and if she was already standing she would pat me on the bottom out the door from a rolled up magazine she had. I got used to it.

So I would and I'd go back to my desk and usually find that someone wanted me to type something then.

There were several days where this happened, where I was called to her office to sit and be quiet and I never did find out why she called me except for me to observe her working on her fingernails and for her to ask me each time if I needed to go to the bathroom.

And sometimes I did, so she'd call Jeanette in, and while Jeanette never did adjust my zipper again (apparently I had learned the Tippy Top Rule the right way finally), she always patted my hands and the front and back of my pants each time to show that each item in question was being done correctly now.

And I didn't mind. In a way I was appreciative of the fact I =WAS= doing things the way they were supposed to be done, unlike the guys that teased me in the restroom at the earlier job I was at who CLEARLY were NOT going to teach me proper etiquette, unlike Nancy who was so patient and kind - well - she DID teach me.

And I was FITTING IN working for BBI, which was most important
of all to me.


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Wow. I liked that chapter a lot. It was long, detail, and kind of emotional. I got to kind of see the dangers (Barbara) of working for BBI, the perks (Nancy), and I also got to learn a bit more about you in the process. :) Suicidal? That's pretty depressed. I hope you're over that now. You seem like such a nice person. XD
It's a great chapter! Please send me an RR when the next one comes out! :)

Posted 6 Years Ago

1 of 1 people found this review constructive.


6 Years Ago

Suicidal thoughts have always been hanging over me - until I was finally put on Seroquel and then th.. read more


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Interesting how this is coming along. I would have liked to be a fly on the wall at that place. I have never worked with that many women at one time.

Posted 6 Years Ago

1 of 1 people found this review constructive.


6 Years Ago

May be a long time before that happens. Can you live in a world where guys wear dresses ? *Grin* Per.. read more

6 Years Ago

I could live in a world where guys wear dresses. After all who am I to judge.

6 Years Ago

Could cause a problem. :D
Dang, such a strange world David. I don't think I could've worked there for long. I would've yelled at someone and quit LOL

Posted 6 Years Ago

1 of 1 people found this review constructive.


6 Years Ago

I really - just really couldn't afford to quit - not after quitting every single job I had before th.. read more

6 Years Ago

Okay. Waiting patiently. :)

6 Years Ago

Twill be on the morrow. :7
I'm glad that in this chapter there weren't "touching" moments..
Someone stealing money from the company??? Interesting!!
Barbara trying to phisically harm you? **thinking very unlady words**
Still hating Nancy way to speak to you..every time I read the word "Scoot", I want to punch her!

Posted 6 Years Ago

1 of 1 people found this review constructive.


6 Years Ago

I live in Texas, born and bred. Well, I haven't bred yet but I guess my Dad and Mom did so I'm here... read more
Riding the Rainbow

6 Years Ago

I asked because from your story it seemed you worked in a country where people do not matter..It sou.. read more

6 Years Ago

Well it wasn't Fort Worth, I think it was an adjacent city. Minju, this was a government job, the fi.. read more
Wow. I liked that chapter a lot. It was long, detail, and kind of emotional. I got to kind of see the dangers (Barbara) of working for BBI, the perks (Nancy), and I also got to learn a bit more about you in the process. :) Suicidal? That's pretty depressed. I hope you're over that now. You seem like such a nice person. XD
It's a great chapter! Please send me an RR when the next one comes out! :)

Posted 6 Years Ago

1 of 1 people found this review constructive.


6 Years Ago

Suicidal thoughts have always been hanging over me - until I was finally put on Seroquel and then th.. read more
Another brilliant chapter that I love it was great!

Posted 6 Years Ago

1 of 1 people found this review constructive.


6 Years Ago

Glad you liked it. I'm looking at the SIZE of some of these chapters and they are HUGE ! If I ever g.. read more

6 Years Ago

yeah that would great!

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