Chapter Eighteen

“Yes,” Pizza says.

“AWESOME! Can I change my name to Pizza? What kind of pizza are you? You look like pepperoni. Are you pepperoni pizza?” I ask.

“Um?” Pizza says. “No?”

“Ignore him,” Quinn says. “He’s had a few too many cups of coffee.”

“I’ve only had seventy-two,” I mutter.

“I’ll bring you the taser,” James says skipping towards the passenger door with Pizza jogging after him.

It took about ten seconds for there to be a thud from behind the van.

“James what the hell?” Derek asks.

“Am I not supposed to tase him?” James asks, his eyes wide.

“NO! You just killed a cop!?” Derek shouts at the top of his lungs.

“I killed him? With a taser?” James says raising an eyebrow. “Honestly, are you sure you’re the son of Athena? It’s a taser. I mean I know I’m good, but I’m not that good.”

“You KILLED Officer Pizza?!” Mick cries, running towards his fallen friend.

“Really? Has everyone gone insane?” James mutters.

“I’m sane,” I say from where I’m standing. “But now I want pizza.”

“YOU WANT TO EAT MY PARTNER?!” Mick shouts. “That’s it. I’ve had enough of you kids.”

“Thanks a lot Derek,” I say, hanging my head. “Now we don’t get pizza.”

“That’s it!” Mick shouts. “I’m taking you all in!”

“What did Derek do this time” James groans. “Gosh Derek can’t you do anything right. Stop getting us all in trouble for your stupidity!”

۝

That was how we all ended up in the back of a police cruiser. Me, James and Derek were in one with Quinn and Moon in another. And backup didn’t even bring the food I had asked for.

“So where do you think they’ll take us?” James asks.

“Seriously?!” Derek shouts. “We’re going to jail, all because you opened your big mouth!”

“You’re blaming me?!” James says. “You’re the one who said tase him!”

“When?!” Derek shouts.

“When you said go get the taser!” James says.

“That didn’t mean tase him!” Derek says.

“Oh,” James says with a shrug.

“Hey!” I say when Officer Mick walked by. “Can I get some of that pizza now? I’m famished.”

Mick hurries along with a shudder, muttering under his breath about cannibalism.

I sigh, apparently everyone was going insane. What was wrong with the world? Couldn’t a guy about to go to prison at least get a decent meal?

۝

Quinn

“This is all your fault,” Moon mutters under her breath.

“How so?” I ask.

“You said to go get the taser!” Moon snaps.

“Well I never told you to start bleeding out in your dream and get the cops on us in the first place,” I say.

“That was not my fault,” Moon says.

“Really? Because no one else almost gave Mutt a heart attack over it.” I mutter turning away from the window to look at her.

“He had a heart attack?” Moon asks, her voice sounding slightly hopeful.

“Almost,” I correct. “I know what’s going on here.”

“You do?” Moon asks. “Mind explaining it to me?”

“Are you in love with my brother Moon?” I ask.

“Okay then, bluntness. Ummmm, maybe?” Moon answers.

“So yes?” I ask.

Moon looks away, “You know, I’m not very comfortable talking about this with you. So maybe we could change the topic.”

I scoff and roll my eyes, turning back to look out the window.

“Why? Has he said something?” Moon asks.

“He hasn’t had too,” I say.

“What does that mean?! Can you please give me a straight answer?” Moon asks.

“Sure, as soon as you start asking a straight question. I am only answering the questions you are asking. Besides, you’re not comfortable talking about this,” I remind her.

“Well forget that, just tell me,” she says, glancing over her shoulder at the other police car that the boys were in. I turn around in time to see Mutt wave at us like a lunatic.

Moon waves back at him. James huffs and crosses his arms with a frown like he had just lost a bet. He probably had.

“Can we go already?” I ask the closest police officer.

“You realize we’re going to jail right?” Moon says.

“Yeah, so? Can we get a move on?” I say.

“Umm,” the officer says, glancing behind him.

“Useless, absolutely useless,” I mutter.

“Why are you in such a hurry?” Mick says.

“Because I have something better to do,” I say. “Don’t you?”

“Like what? Murdering someone else?” Mick sneers.

“Duh,” I say. “How else do you expect them to no longer be a problem? It’s not like I can give them cake and send them off. They’re not Mutt.”

“You’re insane,” Mick says.

“Actually I prefer mentally challenged,” I mutter.

Moon glances at Mick and back at me and rolls her eyes.

“I have nothing to do with this. In fact, I was hitchhiking, can I perhaps go?” Moon says.

Mick glances at her, “Are you lying?”

“Does it look like I’m lying?” Moon asks.

“No,” Mick says. “You look like the most sane person here.”

“I know, see, they had pulled over to drop my boyfriend and I off,” Moon continues.

I turn to look at her, cocking my head to the side glaring at her.

“Oh,” Mick says. He opens the door, “Then you’re free to go.”

“Thanks,” Moon says to him. Dropping her voice she whispers, “That’s how it’s done. Get with it already. Gosh, can’t you do anything?”

I roll my eyes at her as she leaves, Mick unlocking her handcuffs.

۝

Moon

“So which one is your boyfriend?” Mick asks.

“That one,” I say pointing at Mutt.

“Are you sure?” Mick asks.

“Duh,” I say. “I think I know who I’m getting into bed with officer.”

Mick turns beet red and backs away, “Um, I-I’ll just um, you know, go get someone to let him out. Um, yeah, I’ll be, way over there.”

With that he runs away, bumping into other officers all the while turning a darker shade of red.

A female officer walks over and unlocks the door, letting Mutt out before giving James the stink eye and walking away.

“What just happened?” Mutt says.

“Well we’re dating, and not going to jail,” I say.

“So pizza?” he asks.

“Like a date?” I ask.

“Does the date involve pizza?” Mutt asks.

“I mean it could,” I say.

“Well then fudge yes, I’ll buy,” Mutt says, walking away towards Cevin’s van, twirling the keys.

I decided not to mention that part about us sleeping together… yet.

Another officer walks up before we can make it to the van. “We’ve been told to escort you.”

“But we’re getting pizza,” Mutt says.

“Okay,” Mick says.

“No you don’t understand, we’re going on a date, getting pizza then going home,” Mutt says.

“Okay,” Mick repeats.

“You can’t come with us. We’re going home. And I don’t know about you, but we don’t swing that way. Get what I mean?” Mutt says.

Mick turns away so we don’t see his red face, looking like he should be Officer Tomato.

“I mean,” Mutt continues. “They have therapy for that kind of thing, if you think it’s a problem. And I’m sorry, but you’re going to have to find someone else to do it with. Not interested.”

“I am so quitting,” Mick says, running away.

“Huh,” Mutt says with a shrug. “Guess he don’t like his new partner no more.”

I stare at him, eyes wide, not believing what I heard. “Uh, Mutt?”

“Yes gorgeous?” Mutt says.

I frown, maybe he thought I was Lenzie instead of Moon.

“Do you know what you just said to him?” I ask.

“To who?” Mutt asks.

“Officer Mick,” I say slowly.

“Oh, Micky D? Yep. I said we were going to get pizza,” Mutt says.

“No,” I say. “You implied that we were going to have sex after getting that pizza.”

Mutt raises an eyebrow, “Yeah so? That mean you’re not coming?”

“Um,” I say.

“Hey, just cause I said I don’t swing his way don’t mean I won’t swing yours.”

Yep, he definitely thought I was Lenzie. “Okay,” I say. “Um. So pizza?”

He shrugs, “If that’s what you wanna do first sure.”