Chapter 16

Phoenix and I laid low for a couple weeks, but it didn’t take long for people to notice a change in the status quo. Jo and I sat at the “popular” table for once and I actually talked to other people besides Jo. Lunch was still the same no matter who you sat with thought. That’s what I figured out. The foot was nasty, the lunch ladies were mean, and it was still as hot and muggy as before just now there were more people and louder talking. It was nice to be sitting somewhere different and to actually feel important for once. I always looked to this table hoping someday I’d get there. I never actually thought that I would. People would stare at me every single time they walked past the table. Not everyone was used to it, but they were getting there.

Today I sat with the running back of the football team�"Justin Draper. Last year he won player of the year he is one of the best in the nation. When he came into this school as a freshman he was immediately put onto the varsity team. He and Phoenix became quick friends through their time together during all of their football practices. They’d worked together beautifully for years on the field. They showed it when they were also off the field. They had an understanding that not everyone had with another human being. I guess you could say Justin was Phoenix’s best friend but I think that they were more than that. They understood each other on a completely different level than I could even see. People have said that if Justin was a Superhero he would be Phoenix’s sidekick�"I believe it. They were sidekicks on the field and off so there was no doubt that that would be the case.

Justin sat next to me quietly and his blue eyes gazed down at the burrito covering the blue plastic sphere that was holding it. On the plate was bubbling mound of gooey refried beans. Next to that heap was a crunchy burrito and to top off the most delicious lunch of all time was a tiny cup of milk. “Are you really going to eat that?” Justin asked with a disgusted look on his face. Most everyone had left the lunchroom and gone outside to the quad where everyone was during the sunshine months, before winter would come. In the lunchroom it was just Justin and I along with a few gothic kids, who never really go outside, in the corner. Justin had, had to study during most of lunch with one of his teachers. Everyone wanted to go out and throw around a football so I stayed with Justin while he ate.

“I guess so, “I answered his question from before. “Its food, isn’t it?”

                He laughed and pulled a brown bag out of his back pack he had a mother who cared enough to make him a sack lunch every single day. He opened the sack and pulled out a sandwich, cookies, and a juice box. I scrunched up my face and looked at the childish lunch. A bright smile crossed his face. I couldn’t help but realize how attractive he was with a thick and strong jaw much like a football player would like to have. His eye brows burrow far over bright blue eyes that seem to say ‘I’m a whole lot stronger than you and I’m not about to hold back.’ Yet again that attribute was perfect for football. He had a build like the Oresons should have; large broad shoulders, thick legs, strong built arms. Black hair covered his head and was gelled straight up. Much like Phoenix, he also had girls all over him. But his main focus was football. He didn’t ever let girls get inside of his game head.

He laughed when he saw me staring at his lunch. “A little childish I know. But hey, it’s a lot better than what you’re eating.”

                “You got that right.” I poked at the refried beans with my fork pushing the center down. To my surprise the brown steaming pile inflated back up to its previous state. My head shot up to Justin who was laughing hysterically.  His laugher sounded throughout the deserted lunch hall. The Goth’s stared at us in the corner and in a disgusted way got up from their tables and formed back together after throwing their half eaten food into the garbage cans. Laughter wasn’t something that they liked to be around�"or happiness. Justin sucked up his laugh as they walked by.  A glare crossed their makeup painted faces and they slammed the doors when they left. A janitor began to clean the rest of the cafeteria while Justin and I ate together. The lunch ladies put away the different foods they had lying around and quietly chattered to each other.

“Are you going to the game tonight?” Justin asked after a few bites of his sandwich.

                “I should be.” I answered as I poked at the beans again “isn’t it like the big game or something like that?” Justin laughed because knew I was kidding. Tonight was the biggest rival game of the season. Our rival school, the Bears, was from the opposite side of the town. Every year there would be a giant football game where most of the city came and participated. This year the Bears got a new head coach and have been dominating through the entire season. Everyone who was anyone will be there.

“So you and Phoenix have become really close.” He smiled as he looked down at his sandwich. “it’s good for him to have someone to talk to besides just me. Plus, I needed the break.”

                I nodded. Justin didn’t suspect anything, did he? “Ya, it’s good for all of us.”

                He nodded and chewed away at his sandwich. “He’s a good guy.”

                “Ya,” I answered nonchalantly trying to keep away from this particular conversation. 

Justin gave me a weird look and it moved down to my food. He seemed to be amazed that I was actually eating the disgusting food. If you’ve been eating it your whole entire life you seem to get used to it. Suddenly the cafeteria door slammed opened. Phoenix came jumping in, “Tonight is going to be so awesome.” He cheered and danced around our circular table a few times. “Justin we are totally going to dominate tonight.” He danced and jumped while shaking his slim hips in sphere like motions. His face was so full of excitement and determination I had never seen Phoenix so happy or excited for anything in our entire existence together. His hands went to Justin’s shoulders and he squeezed them really hard trying to get Justin as riled as he was. “I’m so excited!” He yelled at the top of his lungs making the words echo loudly throughout the hollow room.

                That’s when it happened. Phoenix released Justin’s shoulder and came to me. Quickly his hands went to the side of my face, too fast for me to stop them. Phoenix’s lips pressed tightly into mine and he shut his eyes. I pulled away and with the fast movement I almost fell backwards onto the floor. I caught myself on the table making the structure screech across the linoleum. Phoenix realized what had just happened and panicked. “Uhm,” was all he seemed to be able to say in this moment�"it wasn’t a very compelling argument. He spun around to Justin whose eye brows had burrowed even further into the center of his face. Phoenix panicked and for the first time I saw pure fear run through him. I cleared my throat hoping I would think of something to say. Phoenix tried to mumble an excuse, “Justin, I don’t know what happened.”

Justin’s hands went up in the air stopping Phoenix from talking anymore. “Listen man, I don’t care what you do in your personal life.”

                Phoenix kneeled in front of him. “Justin, you can’t tell anyone.”

                Justin’s eyes shot to me and with a smile he said “Of course, man. You know I’m always behind you 100 percent. Not only in football.” Phoenix sighed and leaned his head on the table. He looked like he was going to pass out. “But let me ask, why I can’t tell anyone? Dude, you’re gay, so what? I’m pretty sure no one would care.”

Phoenix picked up his head and looked straight at him. “Could you imagine me telling them that?”

                “Yes, and they’d say ‘so what’.” He paused and again looked at me once before returning his focus back on Phoenix. “People love you Phoenix. They just want you to be happy. Plus, who cares man? What’s really the worst that could happen to you? It’s not like they’ll kill you.” Just paused for a moment, “or even hurt you.” Justin laughed at his own sentence that no one else seemed to find funny.  Justin turned and continued eating his sandwich. “I’ve been watching some of the plays and when we do the bull driver you have to watch for me. Don’t pass unless I’m completely open if not, it will be intercepted.”

Phoenix looked at Justin as if his friend was crazy. “Yeah, I think you’re right.” Phoenix spun on his knees and faced me, my eyes still huge and wide.

                “Hey Collin, are you going to drink your milk. I need my calcium.” My hand slid the little carton over to Justin who just continued to eat as if nothing had happened. Phoenix placed his hand on top of my knee. I stroked my fingers over the top of his hand. Maybe Phoenix and I were the ones overreacting. Maybe no one would really care at all. Maybe the only people who cared were Phoenix and I.