Freaking Mentality

For the 10 words I Give Contest

Do you wonder of this CORROSION 

We're like that of a HAMSTER union 

But the bind becomes FLIMSY like this ribbon 

Like a KIDNAPPER , grief has won 

HARVEST time that seems so near 

TURQUOISE waters speak that clear 

But FLICKER of hope is like dying ember 

As AVAILABLE space on a loaded shoulder 

Cast HOLY words like they can do magic 

But those envy CRABS  make this life so tragic 

You want to fly yet you carry their heavy rock 

You'll find out soon that you're falling back 

That mentality of a crab, so far, not gone 

Still here in our plate, we're still Masters of None!

Author's Note

My observation. Wish this "crab mentality" will end soon.

The 10 Words:

C O R R O S I O N
H A M S T E R
F L I M S Y
K I D N A P P E R
H A R V E S T
T U R Q U O I S E
F L I C K E R
A V A I L A B L E
H O L Y
C R A B S

Reviews

[Pax]

"You want to fly yet you carry their heavy rock
You'll find out soon that you're falling back"

- I really like those lines, to which i am able to relate. I wish we could all say that we don't care what they said freely, but sometimes in the end, the fragments of what they had said remains digging holes in our brain on how to retaliate or even shield ourselves to ignore or to spit out some words... I agree with gab on this one, the words were given were hard to compose, but you really did it well, pretty friend, well done... congrats on winning...

[Daisie Vergara (Dhaye)]

Hello, Pax! It's been a while of being silent...but I understand you are still in the time of grieving for the lost of your father. Keep going, my friend.
Thanks for reading.

[Haseo]

your last line really sums it all up, incredible way to describe how humans are self centered.
I liked it.
keep it up

[Daisie Vergara (Dhaye)]

Thank you for reading

[Laura S-C]

This an incredible poem. You have used the ten words brilliantly to form the message and a true message at that. Well done.

[Daisie Vergara (Dhaye)]

Thank you, Laura

[gabrielle]

We may not admit this but we, humans, are very self-centered individuals. We sometimes wish others to fall so that we'll take such opportunity to shine. It's so difficult.to make a poem/verse out of those words but you manage it well.

[Daisie Vergara (Dhaye)]

Thanks, Gab. I thought I may sound as judgmental when it comes to what I observe inside groups or organizations. Can't we just be happy when some people are achieving something or becoming successful in their field...irregardlesss of their age and financial status? When those peoplr worked hard for something, it is just fair that they achieve something and we should not use envy as motivation to pull them down. If only they use envy to motivate themselves strive harder to succeed without hurting other people...

[Daisie Vergara (Dhaye)]

*people.....

[gabrielle]

I get you. When you attain something at an early age, sasabihin nila dahil may MBA ( may backer ako) ka. Ayy, naman. Kung pede lang sabihin na kung may reklamo sila isampa nila sa proper forum at hindi yung kung ano ano pa ginagawa nila para mawalan ka ng credibility.

[Daisie Vergara (Dhaye)]

Tapos na ko sa stage na yan. May nakikita ako sa iba, parang ako rin dati. Kaso nong "masipit" na sila, umayaw na agad. Hirap na e-motivate, na-trauma ata. 😂😂😂

[jacob erin-cilberto]

unhappiness does not go very far in life, does it?

we need joy to kidnap the sadness, and live each day out of our shell and walking with a smile.

j.

[Daisie Vergara (Dhaye)]

Thanks for reading and sharing your insights about it, sir.

[Wicahpi]

That last line brings it all home, doesn't it. It's so true!
All ten words placed nicely into your poem.
With the ways things are going in this world, I almost feel
like I want to be a crab and hide in my shell forever.
Thank you for your entry into the 10 Words I give contest!

[Daisie Vergara (Dhaye)]

Thank you for the kind words.