Very Near

When everything was very near...................

The months passed with preparations and studying that May arrived with

“Tou Parveen auntie khana done karein?” (Should we done the food, Parveen auntie?)

While at home

“Jee ammi parso aaoon gee….aaj Thursday hai na bus phir main Saturday ko aaoon gee”(Yes ammi I will come day after tomorrow….today is Thursday I will come on Saturday)
“Mian saath aaye ga?...Nasree…”(Will husband come along?...Nasree…)
“Uff ho Ammi ek tou tumhein beti se ziyada beti k shohar ki fikar hoti hai”(Uff Ammi you are more worried about daughter’s husband than daughter)
“Aray meri maa isliye pooch rahi thi takay thori taiyaarian karoon”(Ohh god! My mother! I am asking so that I will do more preparations)
“Waah ammi waah! Miyaan aaye tou taiyaarian, miyaan na aaye tou na khushi” (Wow! Ammi! Wow! If husband comes then preparations! If husband not comes then no happiness!)
“Haye meray Maula! Main ne isliye poocha k agar tumhara miyaan saath aanay ka hai tou phir main apnay kapray tumharay walay kamray mein shirft karne ki naa karoon” (Oh my God! I asked so, so that I would not shift my clothes in your room if your husband is coming )
“Phir sahi hai”(then it is fine)
“Acha yeh batao kis kamray mein thairo gee, safai karwaoon takay”(Okay so tell me in which room you will stay, so that I would clean that room.)
“Tum beti sey poocho gee k who kis kamray mein rahay gee takay tum usi kamray ki safai karwao! Meri jagah agar tumhara laadla Fajahad aata tou touu tum poora ghar chamka deti”(You will ask your daughter, in which room she will stay so that you will clean only that room. If there would be your favourite Fajahad on my place, you will clean the whole house instead.)
“Ya Allah meray Khudaya! Tum kiya kha k soyi thi! Isliye pooch rahi hoon takay usi kamray mein apnay kapray shift karoon! Pichli dafa aai thi tou roz roz yahi gila shikwa karti thi k AMMI TUM TOU MERAY PAAS BETHTI HI NAHI HO” (Oh my god! What you have eaten before sleep! I am asking you so that I would shift my clothes in that room! Last time you were upset because I was not staying with you in the same room when you came here and used to say “Ammi you never stays with me”)
“Waah Ammi! Yeh kin a apnay ammi walay kartoot!”(Wow Ammi! That you say Ammi one point!)
“Shukriya! Ab batao kis kamray mein raho gee?”(Thank you! Now tell in which room you wants to stay?)
“Koi bhi kamra aap saaf karwa dein bus wo aap k aur abba ji k kamray sey dur hona chahiye warna phir tum thori thori dair baad hari hari karne chali jaya karo gee apne MAJAZI KHUDA k pass” (Clean any one of the room but it should be away from your and Abba ji’s room otherwise you will run there to romance)
“Jo mera majazi khuda hai wo tumhara bhi shohar hai.”(A person who is my hubby is your husband)“ Ya Allah yeh mujhay kiya sunay ko mil raha hai! Astagfirullah! Astagfirullah! Aye meray Maula yeh main kiya sun rahi hoon! Yeh main kiya tabdeeli dekh rahi hoon! Beti aur Waalid k pak taaluq ko Mian biwi k taaluq mein badla jaa raha hai! Aye mmeray khudaya humein apne azaab sey bacha! Aye khudaya humein….” (Oh what I am listening! God forbidden! God forbidden! What I am listening! What change I am observing! The pure relation of daughter and father is changing into the relation of husband and wife! My Allah! Save me from your anger! Oh Lord we…..)
“Uff meray khudaya! Pakro pakro! Maa k ek ek k jumlay ko pakro! Kabhi tou baksh diya karo mujhay…tum Fajahad k liye khaas haray masalay ka saalan charhaanay rakho….”(Uffff my lord! Grab grab! Grab each and every sentence of your mother! Please leave me without insult sometimes!...you put Green spices one curry on stove for Fajahad….)
“Yeh phir Fajahad agaya tumhari zubaan par! Kahana pasand ka ban raha kisi ki Fajahad ki! Khandan ka beta kaha jaa raha kis sey Fajahad ko! Jab woh pichki hui shampoo ki bottle hi sub kuch hai tou phir hum kiya phaiknay k liye hain!...Yeh waisay ek baat baatyain yeh aap sub ki sui Fajahad pea a kar hu kyun rukti hai! Kiya hum aap logon ko nazar nahi aatay! Kiya hum phaiknay k liye hain!”(Again here is Fajahad on your tongue! Favourite dish is being cooked of whom? Fajahad! Who is being told Family’s son? Fajahad! When that squeezed bottle of shampoo is everything then we all would have been for throwing definitely! Tell me one thing why everyone’s needle stops at Fajahad! Can’t you all see us! Are we for throwing!)

“Hello Sadaf”, the phone was suddenly snatched from her son, Ali-who was keeping his ear very near to the phone when he listened FAJAHAD, who continued “Aray tumharay pass tou chanda jab call kartay hain tab FAJAHAD SERIES chalti hai mera socho poora har din yahi cassette chalti hai. Ab tou mujhe bhi yahi lagmay laga hai k hum tou Edhi Centre k konay sey milay thay” (This FAJAHAD SERIES is played to you when they phone you but think of me who listen this cassette whole day and every day. That is why I also now think that were found from the corner of Edhi Centre)

 “Baqwas band karo” (Stop nonsense!), the mother’s cute anger came out.

“Tumhein pata hai engagement ka Khanna bhi Papa k KHANDANI BETAY k sastay tareen caterers sey ban waya gaya tha” (Do you know that my engagement’s food was order by Papa’s family man’s cheapest caterers?)

“Chalo jee!” (That’s the case!), the phone was taken harshly from him “matlab haad hi ho gai, beta na ho gaya koi pi rho gaya k us ne jo kaha abba ne maan liya!”(Means that limit is over man! As if he is some scholar who’s every word pulls Abba’s head down!)

“Kiya hai kyun peechay pari ho uskay! Haan theek hai main aur tumharay abba uski bohat khaatir madarat karte hain, par iska matlab yeh nahi k tumhari nahi kartay, December sey ab tak tumharay liye yahan rehnnay k dus suit banwa chuki hoon, takay Bilal tang naa karein kareeb mein swimming pool mein membership bhi karwali hai! ek tou waisay hi woh bichara teen hafton baad aa raha hai” (Why are you pointing Fajaad out only! Okay it is right that me and your father keeps him very close to us but it doesn’t mean that we do nothing for you. From December uptill now, I have stitched 10 suits for you for here. And have taken memebership in nearby swimming pool so that Bilal won’t disturb you. And Fajahad, I am preparing for hm a meal because he is coming here after 3 weeks!)

“Aur beti saal baad” (And daughter, a year after)

“Aur beta,..raat baad” (And son…after night)

“Tum tou chup hi karo”(You stay quiet), she eyed at Ali.

“Acha mummy main rakhti hoon,…AllahHafiz” (Okay Mummy, I am disconnecting,…AllahHafiz)

The phone was put down and eyes looked at him “Tum saath aao..abhi tumhein omelette deti hoon aur khud Fajahad k saath joray uthanay k liye nikloon”(You some with me..I will give you omelette now and myself go to pick clothes with Fajahad.)

           -

“Joray uth gaye, ab bus Sadaf k shaadi k kapray baqi hai, woh Sadaf ko kahoon gee k khud boutique sey jaa kar utha lay taqay agar koi fitting ka masla ho tou usi waqt kharay rah kar sahi kara lay” (clothes are picked up, now only Sadaf’s suits are left for shaddi. I would ask Sadaf to pick it up from boutique by herself so that fittings issues would be corrected at the same time if there would be.)

“Jee chachi jaan, aur waisay bhi saaray kaam ho gaye hain. Halls book hogaye hain, cards aa gaye hain bus ab Rukaiya phupi ka Canada sey, Idrees chacha k betay Zakir miyan aur unkay bacho ki Dubai sey aur hum sub ki favourite Ghazala phupi ki Azerbaijan sey annay ki dair hai” (Yes dear chachi! All chores are done! Halls are booked, cards are also arose! Now only  there is wait for the arrival of Rukaiya  phupi from Canada, Idrees Chacha’s son Zakir and his kids from Dubai and our favourite Ghazala Phupi from Azerbaijan.)

      -

All necks turned at door when wheels rolled in, feet stepped in, pant worn legs moved in and voice drifted in “I am back”

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 “Abba mhendi k cards is liye females only” (Abba, mehendi cards are for females, only)

“Kiya matlab females only?” (What do you mean by FEMALES ONLY?)

“Jee papa, mhendi aurton ka function hai is liye aurtain aayein gee sirf” (Yes Papa, Mehendi is women’s function that why only females are welcomed.)

“Haan haan! nahi nahi! Only females!” (Yes yes! No no! Only females!), all females chorused.

“Maan jaye na” (please agree with them)

“Acha chalo theek hai, waisay tang kar raha tha yeh aurton ka hi function hai” (Okay, it is fine. By the way I am just kidding. After all Mehendi is women’s function.)

“Papa liken humari ek shart hai” (Papa but we have demand.)

“Woh kiya”(what?)

“Pehli shart koi mard nahi hoga
dusri shart wahan waiters nahi waitresses hon gee, tak kay hum log sahi sey enjoy kar sakay” (Our first demand is that there should not be a single man present
Second demand is there should be waitresses in hall not waiters so that we can enjoy.)

“Koi mard na ho, aisa nahi ho sakta. Mehndi ka hall nazimabad mein hai, halaat wahan k kaafi kharab hain. Main ne aur Fajahad ne socha tha k ghar k mard chalay jain par tum log maan hi nahi rahay tou ek tou lazmi hai aur who ek mard tumhara bhai hai tou phir dou lazmi hai” (Not a single man! It is not possible! Mehendi hall is in Nazimabad. And situation of a city is very disturbed. Me and Fajahad decided to call family’s men in function but you are not agreeing with it so call at least one. It is necessary. If that one is your brother then two should be allowed.)

“Papa!!”

“Tum dulha bano gay ya rakhwali karo ge!”(will you be a groom or guard!)

“Haan bachiyan log, iss baray mein tou main bhi kahoon gee k ek larka tou lazmi hai, bhalay who tum logon ki marzi ka ho par ek larka humaray ghar ka lazmi hai”(Yes daughters’ party, I would also say to bring at least one guy with you. Okay it is fine to have that guy of your own choice but one guy of our family is must.)

“Tou phir Fajahad done karein” (Okay, then Fajahad is our demand.)

“Haan Fajahad sahi hai, usko waisay bhi idea hai har cheez ka, humaray khandaan ka bacha hai” (Yeah Fajahad is fine. He knows about wedding and halls. He is our family’s son.)

“Main wain koi nahi aa raha, itni sari zanaanion mein main ek larka…Shameer abhi kal aaye ga ussay lay jao tum log..aur parchi parchi kiya yaad nahi aaya..ussay bhi tou koi select kar saktay hain…main hi mila tha kiya tum logon ko” (I will not go with them….Only one guy, that is me in lots of females!...Shameer is coming tomorrow,! Can’t you select him!...And don’t you remember chit chit!..We can select by it too!...am I  the only person left to be chose )

“Acha acha, accountant sahab hum parchi parchi sey decide kartay hain….Farah parchiyan banao, ghar k ek ek mard ka naam har ek parchi par likho..parchi Fajahad uthaye ga, jiska naam niklay ga woh hoga supahi” (Okay Mr. Accountan, we will decide by chit chit…Farah make the chits. Write name of each man on each chit of our family..Fajahad will pick up the chit...He will be the guard whose name will come out)

The technique was played.

The paper was opened and he read “Fajahad”

She shared with him a smart boy one smile he exchanged a squeezing lips that were up and down, not straight, having brows bending down and freckles were coming.

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Author's Note

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