Wit & Wisdom - August 4th 2014

Wit & Wisdom - August 4th 2014

A Chapter by dw817

Scorpios are wise beyond their years. Passion, desire, and power go hand in hand for this sign. They walk, work, and love to the beat of a different drummer. (more)


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  W&W August 4th 2014   


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01. Scorpio.

Scorpios are wise beyond their years. Passion, desire, and power go hand in hand for this sign. They walk, work, and love to the beat of a different drummer.

They are good at hiding their true feelings to the point where you can live with one for years and not truly know their inner being. They can be moody for no apparent reason and never forgive or forget a bad deed. And can be very, very possessive.

On the other hand, when you are kind to a scorpio they will never forget that and will repay your kindness. Gain their trust and the rewards are worth it.

02. "I just love it when a guy flirts and acts interested, only to ignore me later." said no woman ever.

03. I don't always watch scary movies. But when I do, I'm up till 2am watching Disney Princess movies to calm me down.

04. I'm not working out. I'm leveling up.

05. No I am not single. I am in a long distance relationship because my boyfriend lives in the future.

06. You're not truly a parent till you've swatted blindly into the back of the car hoping to connect with your kid.

07. And suddenly you know ... it's time to start something new and trust in the magic of beginnings.

08. The presence of this book means I don't want to talk.

09. ... that awkward moment when you realize the marching band works harder than the football team.

10. Wake me up when I care.

11. Of course I can be nice to you. I just choose not to.

12. Sometimes I amaze myself; other times I can't remember what day it is.

13. Sometimes I wonder how you put up with me. Then I remember; oh, I put up with you - so we're even.

14. Not all girls are made of sugar, spice, and everything nice. Some are made from sarcasm, wine, and everything fine.

15. You know we're good friends when I no longer feel the need to clean up before you come over.

16. Forever disappointed that a group of squids isn't called a squad.

17. Burglar deterrent: A doormat that says, "The neighbors have better stuff."

18. Men say that women should come with instructions ... What's the point of that ? Have you ever seen a man actually read the instructions ?

19. [_] Taken [_] Single [X] Mentally dating a celebrity that has no idea I exist.

20. I love you more than coffee - but not always before coffee.

21. Why is Monday so far from Friday and Friday so near to Monday ?

22. FRIENDS will be there when he breaks up with you. BEST FRIENDS will call him up and whisper in a scary voice, "You will die in 7 days."

23. Warning ! I may spontaneously burst into Disney Songs at any moment.

24. Will you please get some friends so you can stop posting selfies you took of yourself in the bathroom ?

25. You are just so weird sometimes. It's great.


YELLOW is cheerful or warm. Most likely to strain eyes or cause eye fatigue. Can make babies cry.

BLUE the color most preferred by men. Calmness or sereneity. Most used color for offices. Curbs appetite. Associated with water and peace.

RED evokes strong emotions. Encourages appetite. Passion or intensity. Red roses symbolize love.

GREEN health, tranquility, money, nature. Workers in green environments have fewer stomach aches.

PURPLE royalty, wealth, success, wisdom. Many kings wore purple robes.

PINK calming, love, romance. "Drunk tank pink" is a color used in prisons to initially calm inmates.

ORANGE excitement, enthusiasm, warmth, caution. Also used to draw attention: signage.

BROWN reliability, boredom, practicality, Earth.

WHITE Purity, innocence, empty, spacious. Great for creating the illusion of space.

27. Sometimes you will never know the value of a moment - until it becomes a memory.

28. Better to be the one who smiled rather than the one who didn't smile back.

29. Are oranges named orange because they're orange or is the color orange called orange because oranges are orange ?

30. The prospective woman says, "I know the difference between a Phillips and flat head screwdriver, I can cook, I'm a decent shot, and I watch sports. I'm kind of a keeper."

31. Oops ! Did I buy champagne instead of milk again ?

32. The bulletproof vest was actually invented by a pizza delivery guy from Detroit, after he was shot twice on the job !

33. If cheerleading is so easy, how come you can't pick up girls ?

34. Studies show that cows produce more milk when listening to relaxing music.

35. Never judge a book by its movie.

36. Chickens can see daylight 45-minutes before humans can.

37. Too much Pi gives you a large circumference.

38. "The Dark Knight Rises" is the only Batman movie in which they didn't use the Batman Signal.

39. When a tiger roars, it can be heard 2-miles away.

40. US scientists have calculated that Santa Claus would have to visit 822 homes per-second in order to deliver all his Christmas presents on Christmas Eve.

41. All Las Vegas gambling casinos have no clocks or windows as they don't want the people there to know if it's day or night outside.

42. Giraffes have tongues about 21-inches long, which they also use to clean their ears.

43. Bananas and humans share about half the same DNA - which means humans are 50% identical to bananas.

44. There are only 2-countries in the entire world that do not sell Coca Cola. North Korea and Cuba.

45. The Wedding Ring goes on the left ring finger. It is because it's the only finger with a vein that connects to the heart.

46. "U" was first used as a substitute for "You" by Shakespeare.

47. Donald Duck comics were banned in Finland because he doesn't wear any pants.

48. Everything a user says to SIRI on the iPhone 4S is sent directly to Apple and recorded.

49. Gandhi once wrote a letter to his "dear friend" urging him not to go to war ... This friend of his was Hitler.

50. 8 Questions To Help You DECLUTTER:

1. Have I used this in the last year ?
2. If I were shopping right now, would I buy this ?
3. Is the only thing that's keeping me from disposing of this item is that I don't want to waste money ?
4. Am I holding on to this for sentimental value ?
5. Do I have a similar item that serves the same purpose ?
6. Do I have a realistic plan to use this ?
7. Does it fit me or my living space ?
8. Am I holding onto this broken item in hopes of fixing it in the future ?

Which of these can you relate to ?

Stay cool ! And see you next time with 50 more ...

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32. The bulletproof vest was actually invented by a pizza delivery guy from Detroit, after he was shot twice on the job !

Posted 6 Years Ago

1 of 1 people found this review constructive.


6 Years Ago

Oww ... Man that's rough. Dju tell anyone about it ?

6 Years Ago

Some other friends ..who came to my rescue..told sorry stories about me...Like I am a retard and tha.. read more

6 Years Ago

Saved your life too it sounds like. That's good. I've had people in person mistake me many times for.. read more

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Fort Worth, TX