Wit & Wisdom - September 23rd 2013

Wit & Wisdom - September 23rd 2013

A Chapter by dw817
"

Keep staring at me. I might do a trick if you're lucky.

"

  W&W September 23rd 2013  

 

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01. Keep staring at me. I might do a trick if you're lucky.


02. Honk if you love peace and quiet.


03. Tell me again why Kamikaze pilots wore helmets ?


04. Always forgive your enemies; nothing annoys them greater.


05. When you're right, no one remembers. When you're wrong, no one forgets.


06. No matter how bad things get, you got to go on living, even if it kills you.


07. I like long walks, especially when they are taken by people who annoy me.


08. I can resist anything in this world except temptation.


09. To live life is so startling it leaves little time for anything else.


10. Face that way and bend over, I'll show you.


11. Computer dating is fine, If you’re a computer that is.


12. My body is a temple where junk food gets worshiped.


13. As a matter of fact, I =AM= a rocket scientist.


14. You never love someone because they are beautiful; they are beautiful because you LOVE them.


15. Romance has been elegantly defined as the offspring of fiction and love.


16. Love is, above all, the gift of oneself.


17. I have found men who didn't know how to kiss. I've always found the time to teach them.


18. Romance is the glamor which turns the dust of everyday life into a golden haze.


19. Love is the triumph of imagination over intelligence.


20. The most precious possession that ever comes to a man in this world is a woman's heart.


21. Friends are like stars. You may not always be able to see them, but when life is the darkest, it is then you know they are there for you.


22. Let him who would be moved to convince others, be first moved to convince himself.


23. Be thankful we're not getting all the government we're paying for.


24. I do benefits for all religions. I'd hate to blow the hereafter on a technicality.


25. 
Silence is golden but duct tape is silver.



26. You tell your friend as you are walking along, "People think it must be fun to be a super genius, but they don't realize how hard it is to put up with all the idiots in the world." Your friend nods and comments while pointing down, "Isn't your pants zipper supposed to be in the front instead of in your back ?"


27. My bounty is as boundless as the sea, My love as deep; The more I give to thee The more I have, For both are infinite.


28. Life without love is like a tree Without blossom and fruit.


29. Do not follow where the path may lead. Go instead where there is no path and leave a trail.


30. The art of getting someone else to do something you want done because he wants to do it.


31. A general is just as good or just as bad as the troops under his command make him.


32. The real leader has no need to lead -- he is content to point the way.


33. The best of leaders when the job is done, when the task is accomplished, the people will say we have done it ourselves.


34. If your actions inspire others to dream more, learn more, do more and become more, then you are a leader.


35. He who has never learned to obey cannot be a good commander.


36. The ultimate measure of a man is not where he stands in moments of comfort, but where he stands at times of challenge and controversy.


37. Any one can hold the helm when the sea is calm.


38. Never tell people how to do things. Tell them WHAT to do and they will often surprise you with their ingenuity.


39. Where there is no vision, the people perish.


40. Misfortunes, untoward events, lay open, disclose the skill of a general, while success conceals his weakness, his weak points.


41. In this world a man must either be an anvil or a hammer, but never a nail.


42. I light my candle from my friends' torches.


43. A bold onset is half the battle.


44. The power is detested, and miserable the life, of him who wishes to be feared rather than to be loved.


45. Few can rule the rule great that cannot reach the small.


46. He who has learned how to obey will know how to command.


47. A ruler should be slow to punish and swift to reward.


48. It is impossible to imagine anything which better becomes a ruler than mercy.


49. No man is good enough to govern another man without that other man's consent.


50. It is absurd that a man should rule others, who cannot rule himself.





Which of these can you relate to ?



See you next week with 50 more !

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© 2013 dw817


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Reviews

Silence is golden but duct tape is silver.

I liked the ironic humour of this one, but there were some great ones about love too.

Posted 6 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

dw817

6 Years Ago

Love is such a tricky thing to explain. I think it means many things to many different people. In tr.. read more
Pryde Foltz

6 Years Ago

hahahahahahahahaha
My body is a temple where junk food gets worshiped. this one is really funny lol

Posted 6 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

dw817

6 Years Ago

#12 is one Gem liked also. Just remember, "Those who eat sweets must often occupy 2-seats !" and - w.. read more
and #4 is great for those who have haters.

Posted 6 Years Ago


dw817

6 Years Ago

In my experience I have found, "Kill them with kindness," to be an effective weapon. :)
Haha ! #12 sounds realistic for most young people... :D

Posted 6 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

dw817

6 Years Ago

Ah, but always check your weight, or use a BMI calculator.
http://1.usa.gov/XBIO5L
Another round of wisdom! :)

Posted 6 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

dw817

6 Years Ago

And hopefully wit, somewheres in there. :7
Mark

6 Years Ago

Yes that too. :)
Very nice collection again my friend.

Posted 6 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

dw817

6 Years Ago

Which one do you think applies to you best, Doug ?

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Wit & Wisdom


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dw817
dw817

Fort Worth, TX



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